In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is not enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Issues related to diminish
crime
are frequently discussed these days. It is argued that having more police on the street and put offenders into prison
is not effective procedures
. I completely agree Fix the agreement mistake
procedure
with
that solving the main sources of Change preposition
apply
crime
such
as education
and financial position is vital.
The strongest reason to consider is that education
is an element for individual behaviors
. Studies about civil rights and justice make people less likely to become robbers in the future. There is no cause to commit a Change the spelling
behaviours
crime
if they have enough money to provide their
family. Change preposition
for their
For instance
, In Singapore, which has the
one of the best educational systems in the world, the Change the article
apply
crime
rate is among the lowest in the world. Therefore
, learning more about crime
and punishment, one of the most powerful prevent method
, is the effective way to lead Fix the agreement mistake
methods
education
reduces crime
.
In contrast
, some opponents argue that there are benefits of
giving offenders severe sentences. Especially, spending a long time in Change preposition
to
prison
provides an opportunity for the prison
services to rehabilitate a prisoner. This
view seems plausible, but it fails to consider that leaving people in prison
for a long time will lead them learn
criminal skills from Add the particle
to learn
other prisoner
. Change the wording
another prisoner
other prisoners
This
will result in worse
situation and their character will not improve. Add an article
a worse
Also
, the government could focus resources on the causes of crime
.
All things considered, I am of the opinion that an efficient education
is suitable
reason to prevent Change the article
a suitable
crime
. Yet the government should advocate to provide it.Submitted by w.walaiphorn on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite