IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Globalization is positive for economies but its negative sides should not be ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#globalization #economies
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Globalization
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 is the development of our society that allows the economies of one country to thrive. Even Though it benefits countries’ money flow in the country, individuals should not overlook the drawbacks. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 thinking as some local businesses could be disrupted and physical labour could be replaced due to
globalization
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. We cannot deny the fact that
globalization
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 systems tend to advantage a huge multinational company over a small native
business
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. Because of international companies establishing,
people
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 rather choose and buy them over no-name businesses in their local area;
hence
Linking Words
, the rich
business
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 becomes richer, while the poor
business
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 gets poorer. All of my teenage friends prefer buying clothes from international stores
such
Linking Words
 as Zara and H&M than clothes at the local stores and I think in the future
people
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 will not buy clothes from those local stores anymore.
In addition
Linking Words
, low-skilled workers could be replaced by the use of
advanced-technological
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advanced technological
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 machines.
Globalization
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 enables technology to improve rapidly to help humans achieve difficult tasks and because of the invention of smart mechanisms, entrepreneurs of many factories replace humans with those devices for more convenience and effectiveness. In the past, my uncle worked for one cloth factory, but now he got fired because his factory purchased machines that process faster than him. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
globalization
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 may benefit monetary aspects in a country, it
also
Linking Words
 restricts other areas like local
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business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
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 and
people
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 from thriving. At the end of the day, I am in complete agreement that
people
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 should see both two faces of the coin.
Submitted by mintjinjutha on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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