Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some
people
hold the view that athletes deserve to be paid more
while
others argue that there are other more important professions in which
people
should be paid more.
I
Add a verb
I am
I was
show examples
more inclined towards the latter. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
hand, sports professionals have to do a lot of strenuous activities to earn money. They did not earn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fame overnight, they
did
Verb problem
made
show examples
tremendous efforts,
worked
Wrong verb form
working
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then
fingers to bones, to reach the
extremity
Fix the agreement mistake
extremities
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. I am convinced that not
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
but fame is what brings them more money. Common
people
worship and are intrigued by
sportman
Correct your spelling
sportsman
sportsmen
. Their popularity helps them to
endorse
Wrong verb form
be endorsed
show examples
in several campaigns and advertisements.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
the other hand, scientists and
people
in the healthcare industry dedicate their lives
for
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to
show examples
the betterment of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Scientists spent night after night in laboratories to invent
cure
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cures
show examples
for several diseases. From increasing our longevity to making transport easier, they have helped us in various ways.
Similarly
, doctors and other healthcare workers prioritize our lives more than
this
. They spent most of the day treating and serving patients. Given the COVID situation, we can see how doctors and nurses are selflessly looking after the infected
people
. Without fearing
of
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apply
show examples
contracting the dis virus, they are spending sleepless nights looking after the patients. Teachers
also
deserve to be paid more as they play a crucial role in building the future leaders of the world.
To conclude
,
although
sports professionals have to undergo a lot of
painstating
Correct your spelling
painstaking
tasks to reach
this
position, that does not make
other profession
Change the wording
another profession
other professions
show examples
less than that. In my
opinions
Fix the agreement mistake
opinion
show examples
, there are other more important
profession
Change the wording
professions
show examples
in which
people
deserve to be paid more.
Submitted by maimunazaman474 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial remuneration
  • exceptional
  • merit
  • talent
  • demand
  • entertainment value
  • career span
  • physical demands
  • justified
  • unfair
  • criticism
  • income inequality
  • societal priorities
  • sportsmanship
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