IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
It is often argued that we have a lot of ways to select something more than in the past. I totally agree with
this
 opinion because these days
people
 can use more efficient in
technology
 and they have more opportunities in their job.
First
 of all, The main reason why I believe
people
 have lots of choices is that nowadays it has
a
Correct article usage
apply
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modern
technology
that is
 useful and convenient.
Technology
 is extremely aiding
people
 to find any information that they want to know about.
For example
, we use the Google to search data and solve the problem that happens in our life, and the Google has several websites that we can choose any blogs that you love
also
 there is a lot of option to lead you to the best decision.
Furthermore
, another reason why I support the notion that opportunity in occupation is much more magnified than in the past
because
Add a missing verb
is because
show examples
business
 economics are progressing every year that can lead to lots of investment in the
business
 company.
This
 is why many companies have to announce to find new employees and
this
 is lead to increase the opportunity for
people
 to pick their job and satisfied company.
For instance
, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent year, The UK
business
 showed
a
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apply
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rapid growth.
This
 event effect lots of cooperation in the UK to search for more workers. In conclusion, I completely agree that
people
 can pick several choices that they wanted.
This
 is because advances in
technology
 to find their information and the development of economic
business
 make almost population have more opportunities to choose their career and work company.
Submitted by Marker & Kaohom on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
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