IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Overpopulation is the world's most serious environmental problem.

#overpopulation #world
The majority of a people believes that excess public is
one
 of the key
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
 for sphere concerns. I completely agree with
this
 opinion
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 a tremendous amount of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 has
poluted
Correct your spelling
polluted
 the planet,
this
 has
acelerated
Correct your spelling
accelerated
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global warming and deforestation.
First
 and
formost
Correct your spelling
foremost
for most
, I
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
one
 of the most undesirable
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
 due
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 extra citizen is
increase
Add an article
an increase
the increase
show examples
 in
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
, with every passing year our place is getting warmer. The more resident
dwell
Change the verb form
dwells
show examples
 in
one
 place, the more trash is dumped without proper
segrigation
Correct your spelling
segregation
. To decompose it
athourities
Correct your spelling
authorities
 burn the garbage which
include
Change the verb form
includes
show examples
 materials
responsinble
Correct your spelling
responsible
 for
emmitting
Correct your spelling
emitting
carbon-di- oxide
Correct your spelling
carbon-dioxide
show examples
 in
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
, and CO2 is
one
 of the primary
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
 of global warming .
For instance
,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 of
Mumabi
Correct your spelling
Mumbai
 has
increasd
Correct your spelling
increased
68
Change preposition
by 68
show examples
 % in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 two decades.
Therefore
, trash burning has surged over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time.
As a result
, the annual
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
this
 region is 4.5
degreee
Correct your spelling
degree
degrees
 higher.
Secondly
, the excess citizen has
damanged
Correct your spelling
damaged
 the habitat by increasing the deforestation .A large number of people means the higher the
deamnd
Correct your spelling
demand
demands
 of lands where they can stay with their
familes
Correct your spelling
families
 .
Hence
, the larger number of forests are transformed into places where cities are built with housing societies .To illustrate, Banglore is the IT hub in
Inida
Correct your spelling
India
 , every year millions of people
miragte
Correct your spelling
migrate
mirage
their
Correct your spelling
there
show examples
 from other parts of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
. Housing demand of
banglore
Correct your spelling
Bangalore
Banglore
 has increased in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 5 years , in order to meet demand and provide home real estate sector has vanished 100 acres of forest land to construct residential towers. To conclude, I strongly
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 that increase in population is worst issue
concering
Correct your spelling
concerning
 the
enviornment
Correct your spelling
environment
. As it
act
Change the verb form
acts
show examples
 as
catalyst
Add an article
a catalyst
show examples
 for issues like global warming and deforestation on our planet .In
future
Add a comma
,future
show examples
 it is expected the world population will increase so the government should run the education
progams
Correct your spelling
programs
 for their citizen about
envionment
Correct your spelling
environment
environmental
 degradation.
Submitted by rahulbhajji on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • exacerbating
  • finite resources
  • environmental degradation
  • biodiversity
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • sustainable consumption
  • habitat loss
  • family planning
  • renewable energy
  • technological advancements
  • resource management
What to do next:
Look at other essays: