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Band 5

tourism bringing environmental problems, what are the causes and suggest some solutions

#tourism
Nowadays, travelling has become
favourite
Add an article
a favourite
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 past time of
people
 as in free time they love
travel
Add the particle
to travel
show examples
 to distinct places. But,
tourism
 is a bag full of advantages and disadvantages as it sometimes causes environmental degradation.
I n
Correct your spelling
In
show examples
 the upcoming paragraphs, it is discussed that how
tourism
 effect nature and what is
solution
Add an article
the solution
a solution
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 to
this
 problem
.
Add a missing verb
is.
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 Primarily, because of
tourism
Add a comma
,tourism
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 a group of
people
 come to a place where they enjoy eatables and it is often seen that they throw the garbage on
roadside
Correct article usage
the roadside
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.
Furthermore
, for travelling to other areas at an individual's
convinience
Correct your spelling
convenience
 he/she prefers to travel by a private vehicle which causes different kinds of pollution.
For example
, recently after the ease of lockdown guidelines many
people
 travelled to hill stations due to which there was congestion on the roads and these vehicles caused air pollution and noise pollution
also
.
On the other hand
, the advantages of
tourism
 cannot
be ignores
Change the verb form
be ignored
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 as it boosts the economy and is earning of local vendors. Due to
this
, it is necessary that government should adopt certain measures like imposing certain
penalities
Correct your spelling
penalties
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 on
people
 who throw their garbage outside the dustbin.
Furthermore
,
there
Replace the word
their
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 government can issue guidelines related to limit the use of
private
Add an article
the private
a private
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vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
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.
For instance
, in
Delhi
Add a comma
,Delhi
show examples
 there is
odd-even
Add an article
an odd-even
the odd-even
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 rule that means, on one day there are only those cars on the road
those
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 have odd number plates and vice versa. To conclude, I would like to say that if
Correct your spelling
government
governments
governement
Correct article usage
the governement
show examples
 come up with solutions to these problems
then
 definitely,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of
tourism
 will outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by hmann2396 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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