There has been an increase in the incident of anti-social behavior in the last few years. What are the reasons for this increase? What can society do to solve this problem?

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Presently, it is true that anti-social

behaviours

Use synonyms

have become more common in many societies. There are numerous reasons for

this

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as well as

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there are possible solutions to solve the problem, which will be

further

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examined in the following essay. There are various causes as to why

people

Use synonyms

have anti-social

behaviours

Use synonyms

. The first and most significant is

advancement

Correct article usage

the advancement

show examples

in modern technologies

as a result

Linking Words

of a lack of interaction between other

people

Use synonyms

,especially children. Mobile phones are good examples of

this

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because nowadays most parents allow their kids to spend a lot of time on the internet

instead

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of doing outdoor activities with their neighbours.

This

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causes children to not have sufficient social skills when they grow up

therefore

Linking Words

, they prefer to enjoy themselves alone and do not pay attention to others.

Moreover

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, most websites

such

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as Facebook, Twitter and YouTube have many bad influences, resulting in changing

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

attitudes in bad perspectives because they want to be more famous

Change preposition

show examples

social media. Despite the aforementioned causes, there are some effective solutions that can be put forward

Change preposition

against

show examples

anti-social

behaviours

Use synonyms

. The most essential is a campaign which is held by governments and societies as well. Voluntary works are good campaigns to educate

people

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in societies to have good

behaviours

Use synonyms

in public.

Furthermore

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, these make opportunities for

people

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to make new friends and expose their own skills and opinions in the right places.

Apart from

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this

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, another point is serious regulation on the internet nowadays social media are popular online platforms which attract a majority of

people

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Therefore

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, there should be a punishment for

people

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who are bad influences. In conclusion, it can be seen that anti-social

behaviours

Use synonyms

are caused by many factors, but it has some potential solutions. Personally, it is my belief that if both

people

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and governments realize the problem

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

exists,

then

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it can be solved quickly and effectively.

ploy_41Fri Aug 20 2021

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Coherence and Cohesion

Work on providing a more balanced conclusion by summarizing key points from each part of the essay clearly. This will strengthen the overall cohesiveness of your writing.

Task Achievement

Include more specific examples to support your ideas. This strengthens your argument and shows a deeper understanding of the topic.

Task Achievement

Ensure that ideas are clearly articulated and directly linked to the question. Avoid general statements and focus on precision.

Task Achievement

The essay presents clear main ideas and recognizes the complexity of the issue, which is commendable.

Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction sets the stage effectively and previews the content of the essay, providing a clear roadmap for the reader.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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There has been an increase in the incident of anti-social behavior in the last few years. What are the reasons for this increase? What can society do to solve this problem?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Children's education is expensive. In some countries, the government pays some or all of the costs. Do the edvantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now ‘one big traffic jam’. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage from using their cars?

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.