IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that after a child enters school their teachers will have more influence than their parents. To what extent do agree or disagree ?

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Number
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A number
The number
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 of people thinks that
children
Use synonyms
has
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have
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 more impact
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
teachers
Use synonyms
 rather than their
parents
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 after they join the
school
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. I fully agree with the above utterance as
infant
Fix the agreement mistake
infants
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 spend more
time
Use synonyms
 in
school
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. To commence with the view of disagreement that
parents
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 have influent their
children
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 more and they become their role model.
In other words
Linking Words
,
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
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 are the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 who
live
Change the verb form
lives
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 their child from the beginning of
the
Change the word
their
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 life and they have
impacted
Correct article usage
an impacted
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 on
child
Add an article
the child
a child
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. So
parents
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also
Linking Words
 influence their
children
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 a lot in life. Shifting towards
view
Correct article usage
the view
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 of
agreement
Add an article
the agreement
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,
children
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 spend their quality of
time
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 in
school
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 and classes
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throughout
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through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
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 the day with their
teachers
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. To elaborate it, in
school
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child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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 spend around six hours per day and they try to share their problem with the
teachers
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,
recent
Add an article
a recent
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 survey was conducted by
Central
Correct article usage
the Central
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 Education department in India, which results
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 around 80% of
children
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 spend long hours in
school
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 rather than
home
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at home
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, by spending more
time
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 in
school
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 get
Correct your spelling
affected
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effected
Correct your spelling
affected
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 by
teachers
Use synonyms
.
Further
Linking Words
 strengthening view as
teachers
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 are the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 who can judge the ability of the
student
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 and try to shape their career in the proper direction. To explain it,
Add an article
the teacher
a teacher
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teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
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 can know the talent of
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 and they will teach them
accordingly
Linking Words
 and give proper guidance in building
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 future.
For instance
Linking Words
,
a
Correct article usage
apply
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Jim Barney the person who was
good
Add an article
a good
the good
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 architect.
His
Correct your spelling
He's
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interested
Replace the word
interest
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 in architect was seen by their teacher during their secondary
school
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 and due to the proper guidance of their
school
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teachers
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along-with
Correct your spelling
along with
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 his
parent
Add a comma
,parent
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 he became
successful
Add an article
a successful
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 architect.
Thus
Linking Words
,
teachers
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 have
impact
Add an article
an impact
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
parents
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 are the
first
Linking Words
teachers
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 of their
children
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 even though
children
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 spend more
time
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 in
school
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. So,
teachers
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also
Linking Words
 equally influenced the
student
Use synonyms
.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • shaping
  • academic skills
  • social behaviors
  • attitudes
  • exposure
  • perspectives
  • role models
  • integrity
  • responsibility
  • homogenous
  • values
  • beliefs
  • effective communication
  • partnership
  • negative reinforcement
  • bullying
  • guidance
  • experiences
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