IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

International tourism has brought about enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#tourism #places #time #concern #impact #inhabitants #environment
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Tourism
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 is one of the booming industries of
current
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the current
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 time. International
tourism
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 gives
people
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 an opportunity to explore cultures worldwide and boosts the local economy.
However
Linking Words
, every coin has two sides,
rampant
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a rampant
the rampant
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 number of
tourists
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 turning up every year disrupts the normal life at the
tourist
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 destination.
Hence
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, the number of
people
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 visiting a place has to be controlled. Globalisation has led to an exponential rise in global
tourism
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.
Tourism
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 has many advantages
such
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 as financial upliftment of the native
people
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 of the
tourist
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 destination.
Arrival
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The arrival
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 of visitors ensures that the local
people
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 get employment as drivers, room service, chefs,etc. Local artists making handicrafts, jewellery get a helping hand from foreign
tourists
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.
Such
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 employment helps locals to satisfy their basic needs and save money for the future.
For example
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, the Indian state of Rajasthan is famous for its Palaces and Bandhani cloth. When international
tourists
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 arrive they prefer to stay at the medieval palaces which have been renovated as hotels to experience the grandeur. These palaces employ local
people
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 in various services mentioned previously.
People
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 insist on buying the Bandhani clothes as a reminder of their journey to India which helps the women who prepare
this
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 Bandhani cloth. Despite these advantages, the concerns about disruption of local life and environment cannot be considered invalid. Large throngs of
tourists
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 arriving at
tourist
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 hotspots
derails
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derail
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 the regular life of the native inhabitants in unimaginable ways. The trends suggest that
development
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the development
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 of a place at
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tourist
Correct article usage
a tourist
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 hotspot makes it dependant on one industry which makes it highly vulnerable. There have been many environmental hazards due to
tourism
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 which may lead to
catastrophical
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catastrophic
 events in the future.
For instance
Linking Words
, the Dal Lake of Jammu and Kashmir in India is now
completeley
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completely
 polluted by the
waste water
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wastewater
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 from the shikaras. The owners of these shikaras primarily entertain
tourists
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 for a living. To conclude, international
tourism
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 should be allowed only to the extent that our decisions should not come to haunt us in the
furure
Correct your spelling
future
.
Submitted by mihika.yeolekar0912 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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