IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport systems. To what extent do you agree?

#people #money #roads #motorways #transport #systems
Since the mid-twentieth century, the autobahn or motorway has been a central element of the
transport
system
 in many counties.
That is
 why some people suggest spending more money on it
instead
 of mass
transport
. In my opinion, I cannot fully subscribe to
this
 view, and I believe that both
transport
 systems have their targeted areas and should
therefore
 be developed together. Undoubtedly,
road
 systems are playing an extremely vital role in modern life. A well-developed
road
system
 is not only the most convenient option for people to commute nowadays but
also
 an essential prerequisite for industrial development. The highway network provides significant economic benefits to individuals and businesses throughout the whole country. Improved reliability, quality, and access of the highway network promote efficiency through industrial restructuring, adoption of new
transport
 technologies, cost reductions, and changes in distribution or logistics patterns.
Thus
, a well-functioning highway network helps the nation maintain a globally competitive position.
However
, the development of public
transport
 is
also
 gradually threatening the dominance of the
road
system
 in the
transport
 sector. For short commutes, public
transport
 is cheaper and less affected by traffic jams than driving their vehicle, as even buses have their bus lane and
thus
 do not need to share the same congested
road
 with other vehicles.
Moreover
, it is more environmentally friendly since it cost less energy per person.
Nevertheless
, the motorway
system
 remains irreplaceable for long journeys or logistics, especially for delivering large volumes of goods, which are challenging to deliver door-to-door by mass transit. I reiterate my view that it is necessary to develop the
road
system
 and the mass transit
system
 together rather than emphasise the
road
system
. Only by making the two modes of
transport
 work together can we achieve the effect of one plus one.
Submitted by baozilyn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: