Many people think happiness relies upon the responsibility of individuals, others think that is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion

How do we find

happiness

Use synonyms

? It has always been a huge question for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

humanity. Some

people

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believe that it relies upon the responsibility of individuals, whereas

others

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support that, it is affected by other factors.

This

Linking Words

essay intends to discuss both arguments and I will give my own point of view.

Firstly

Linking Words

, there are

differents

Correct your spelling

different

show examples

ways to find

happiness

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. Some

people

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think that it is a feeling you must choose in order to enjoy it.

For instance

Linking Words

, whether someone is focused only on the noteworthies moments of his life,

then

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everythings

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everything

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

has happened , will appear as if it was for the best. Indeed, even if someone has experienced pain, some

people

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support that it is just a tiny time to suffer,

then

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something better will come.

Then

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, everyone has

Correct your spelling

his

show examples

own description of

this

Linking Words

, but often, it is defined as the feeling of being full. But,

beeing

Correct your spelling

being

full is

also

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subjective because you can see somebody with nothing

materials

Fix the agreement mistake

material

show examples

but so many

richess

Correct your spelling

richness

inside him

such

Linking Words

as experiences, meeting, adventures... For

this

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reason,

beeing

Correct your spelling

being

happy is just

Correct your spelling

habits

habit

habbits

Correct article usage

a habbits

show examples

to have. Trying to see every little

things

Change to a singular noun

thing

show examples

which

happens

Change the verb form

happen

show examples

during your

dayly

Correct your spelling

daily

routine

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routines

show examples

such

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as the sunrise

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show examples

the morning, the smile of a pedestrian and

others

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On the other hand

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, some communities believe that being happy is up to exterior factors

such

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as money or high

Correct your spelling

status

show examples

statue

Correct your spelling

status

show examples

in society. As they believe that, their own description of

this

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, is directly linked to the

others

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. Obviously, having

many

Replace the quantifier

much

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money, makes events easier.

For example

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, buying whatsoever is possible., but quick pleasure does not make

people

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beaming because

that is

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just material, while

happiness

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is finding peace inside your heart, not on the outside with your

appearence

Correct your spelling

appearance

. Finding who you are is being able to be

independant

Correct your spelling

independent

and detached from

others

Use synonyms

views. To conclude, I believe that everyone needs to find

itself

Correct pronoun usage

themselves

show examples

before ask for more things

such

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objecst

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objects

, love , important job or

rewarness

Correct your spelling

awareness

. Finding a good

confort

Correct your spelling

comfort

such

Linking Words

happiness

Use synonyms

is a tricky balance to find between how you are feeling in your own body, with your soul and with

others

Use synonyms

relations.

Change the preposition

show examples

the end, finding peace is the same thing, it comes

whe

Correct your spelling

when

where

you start to be a sighted person .

eve.gilquin06

Aug 23, 2021

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

376 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

individual responsibility
personal mindset
proactive steps
self-improvement
socio-economic status
relationships
environmental conditions
external factors
positive attitude
pursuit of happiness
facilitate
hamper
proactive engagement
sense of achievement
conducive environment

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Many people think happiness relies upon the responsibility of individuals, others think that is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion

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Recent advances in technology leads the fact that human workforce is gradually replaced with machinery. What are some problems caused by this trend, and how could they be dealt with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

In many cities the construction of new houses and office building is not controlled. this leads to people building in whatever style they want without thinking about design. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people think that there could be more benefits to society if more people study business than history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?