Some people claim that what people eat in many Western countries is unhealthy and that their diet is getting worse .Critics say that these countries should change their diet. What are your opinion on this?

#people #countries #diet #critics #change

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Over recent years, an increasing number of

people

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have been claiming that food in many Western

countries

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is not healthy and arguments have persisted as to whether

people

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in these

countries

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should change their

diet

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Although

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there are convincing arguments on both sides, I strongly agree with these opinions. As far as I know, fast

foods

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and soft drinks are the main

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diet

Change the noun form

diets

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of many Western

people

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, partly because they are too busy at work so they do not have time to cook by themselves, partly because many of them are so poor that they cannot afford healthy

foods

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However

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, it should be mentioned that fast

foods

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and soft drinks are extremely unhealthy. In fact, if consumed too frequently, they can cause several diseases

such

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as obesity or even some types of cancers. For their own

benefits

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benefit

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people

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in these Western

countries

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should change their

diet

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Firstly

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, they should limit eating junk

foods

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and replace them

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with

show examples

homemade cooks

such

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as rice or soup, which are not only affordable but

also

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easy to make.

In addition

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, they should

also

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add more fruits and vegetables to their

diet

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. These provide vitamins and nutritions, helping to maintain a healthy gut and prevent constipation and other digestion problems.

Secondly

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besides

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converting their menus, Western

people

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can

also

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improve their health by exercising more.

Moreover

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, physical exercise relaxes their body and improves creative thinking at work. In short, the diets of

people

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from Western

countries

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are detrimental mainly because of the amount of fast food they consume.

As a result

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, they should change their

diet

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by limiting junk food and adding fruits and vegetables;

also

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, exercising more is

also

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recommended.

Submitted by khuongquynhnga1997 on Mon Aug 23 2021

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

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Some people claim that what people eat in many Western countries is unhealthy and that their diet is getting worse .Critics say that these countries should change their diet. What are your opinion on this?

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