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Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or storage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #storage #money #situations
Many
people
 find themselves in a position where they must accept what
life
 has given to them or find a way to move up the ladder.
Although
 accepting your current situation in
life
 is pragmatic in some cases, I strongly opine that it is still better to put effort to make
improve
Replace the word
improvements
show examples
such
situations
 as it can bring changes to a certain degree. On the surface, the vast majority of
people
 are unable to drastically improve their lives in various
countries
 that are suffering from dire economic conditions or affected by internal conflicts. Business Insider,
for example
, reported in 2021 that Afghanistan is one of the poorest
countries
 in the world due to civil
war
 and terrorism.
Therefore
, it is unfair to suggest citizens of those
countries
to
Remove the particle
apply
show examples
find ways to improve their lives, which might be an impossible task. Alternatively,
such
people
 may feel that they are better off accepting their
situations
 and focus on their survival.
However
, these circumstances are rare but still exists in various nations across the globe.
On the other hand
, few would argue that even in the most difficult
situations
, individuals can make their
life
 better through continuous effort and
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
.
In other words
, several
countries
 achieved the status of superpower through the strong willpower and determination of their citizens.
For instance
, post-world
war
countries
such
 as Japan, Germany, South Korea, etcetera, were devasted by
war
 to a greater extent, but they became economic superpowers. After world
war
 two, Japan was left with a huge national debt, their infrastructure to rubble and left their population depleted. By not accepting their circumstances and the hardworking mentality of the
people
, made them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
be the leaders of technology through notable companies like Sony, Panasonic, Nissan, Toyota, etcetera. To conclude,
although
 accepting rough
situations
 can be practically true in some scenarios, I strongly opine that
people
 should work hard towards the upliftment to have a better
life
.
Submitted by jerinjohn17 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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