Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit

Teens

are the important assets of a nation; thereby inculcate free social services to the community could shape their

future

in an effective way and mould them

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

better citizens. I totally agree with the aforementioned statement for the following reasons explained in the following paragraphs. The

first

and foremost benefit is that adolescents start understanding the importance and value of

Correct article usage

the

show examples

society in which they live.

In other words

, when the habit of offering social services to the older ones is instilled since the teenage, they would start interacting with

seniors

and can imbibe invaluable information from

seniors

' experience.

Therefore

, juveniles would act more responsible and mature by watching and analysing aged peoples' behaviour.

For instance

, the environment where we live

Change preposition

apply

show examples

affects us in

numerous

Change the article

a numerous

show examples

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

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, so the habit of connecting our

seniors

is ingrained in them and in

future

Add a comma

,future

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it would become their habit that would be a win-win situation for our younger and old ones.

Secondly

, the free time that juveniles could invest in shaping themselves as

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good and humble

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

could be wasted by roaming here and there.

Hence

, providing free social services to older citizens them to manage their

Correct your spelling

free time

show examples

free-time

Correct your spelling

free time

show examples

in a good way.

Nevertheless

, even in

future

, the society could get enormous benefits from them, and our

seniors

would never feel lonely or depressed as their

teens

are looking after them when they have spare time from their studies. To conclude

then

this

phenomenon would

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

creat

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

a win-win situation for both

teens

and aged people;

teens

can polish and modify their behaviour by following and interacting

their

Change preposition

with their

show examples

seniors

while aged people

also

get a chance to engage with their

future

generation and

less

Add a missing verb

are less

show examples

likely to feel isolated and depressed.

Submitted by parneet.k876 on Fri Aug 27 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

required
unpaid
community work
benefit
teenagers
life skills
volunteering
empathy
compassion
socially aware
responsible
interact
diverse backgrounds
cultural understanding
tolerance
work experience
essential skills
employment
interests
passions
career development
contribute
betterment
development
local community
mental well-being
stress
self-esteem
burden
academic
personal lives
time management
support
balance
participate
encouraged
numerous benefits
individuals
conclusion

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Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You have arranged a meeting with a business partner. Unfortunately, you have to change the arrangement. Write a letter to your business partner. In your letter, apologize for the changes explain the reason why the changes were needed explain the new arrangement

In twenty years there will be fewer cars in use than there are today". Do you agree or disagree

Some people think all university student should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology.

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.