Many people believe that social networking sites(Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on individuals and society . To what extent do you agree.

#people #sites #facebook #impact #individuals #society

It is often argued that social media networks,

such

as Facebook engenders many adverse effects on individuals and the

community

. I completely agree with

this

view and think that

this

way of communication can leads to undesirable consequences .

Firstly

,overusing social platforms tends undoubtedly to decrease

real-humans

Correct your spelling

real-human

show examples

interaction among

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

In other words

, many individuals prefer to be in touch with their friends or families via network apps rather than physical in-person connections, which provides valuable benefits to humans by improving their communication skills and have a healthy brain.

For example

, researchers show that people become less close to their member families and friends because they tend to use apps of social media ,

such

as Facebook and messenger . That's why social websites

leads

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

to reduce in-person socialization among

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

Secondly

this

new method of communication can facilitate laziness and discourage persons to perform their daily activities .To put

simply

Correct pronoun usage

it simply

show examples

, the Internet

community

makes life so convenient and effortless because

instead

of doing active leisure, individuals tend to develop virtual hobbies via social platforms.

For instance

, youngers prefer to make a video call or chatting on social media with their friends rather than running with them in the park .

In addition

, public spend much time on chatting on Messanger or watching video on Facebook ,

therefore

they waste time which it should be investigate on performing tasks and daily responsibilities .

Thus

this

tendency may affect negatively the life of humans and the

community

by transforming them into inactive and ineffective members of society . In conclusion , despite some advantages of social networks , I strongly believe that it has many disadvantageous drawbacks to the humans and the

community

Submitted by elgalalafatimazahra on Sat Aug 28 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

erosion
face-to-face
interactions
privacy concerns
data breaches
misinformation
polarize
cyberbullying
online harassment
procrastination
productivity
social isolation
dissemination
breeding ground
vast amounts
personal information
mental health

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Many people believe that social networking sites(Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on individuals and society . To what extent do you agree.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

More and more serious crimes seem to be committed each year. Some think that the death penalty is the best way to deal with this problem while other people think different measures are more likely to be successful. Discuss both options.

Human activities have had a negative effect on ecosystem, animals and plants across the world. Some people believe this can not changed while others feel that we can still take action to protect living things and the environment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Success is often measured by wealth and material possessions. Do you think wealth is the measurement of success? What makes a successful person?

Nowadays young people spend too much of their free time on shopping malls. This has negative effects on themselves and the society they live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?