IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Scientific research today attempts to go too far. There are certain things in the world which we simply should not try to understand. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Hereby I express my deep interest in applying for the Master of Engineering in “
Energy
Use synonyms
 and Environmental Management in Developing Countries” at Europa-Universität Flensburg
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 since I wish to continue my academic path in
such
Linking Words
 a renowned University and specialize my expertise in the
energy
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 field, the area where I started my professional career. I am Industrial Engineer
graduated
Correct pronoun usage
who graduated
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at
Change preposition
from
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 Universidade de Fortaleza in 2016 and I have
also
Linking Words
 concluded a Master of Business Administration in Project Management in 2019, which has pleasantly surprised me with wide lessons and good practices that can be applied to any area. During my professional journey, I have always pursued to achieve higher levels and stand out in the competitive job market. In order to enrich my curriculum, I count on several courses and certifications,
such
Linking Words
 as Black Belt Lean Six Sigma, 6 Sigma for Design and APQP4Wind. My
first
Linking Words
 contact with the
energy
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 sector was in 2015
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 when I started to work at Aeris
Energy
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 as an intern and worked my way until the engineer position. Aeris is a wind blade manufacturer with more than 5000 employees and has produced thousands of blades worldwide for important players in
wind
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the wind
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 market,
such
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 as Vestas, Siemens Gamesa, Nordex, GE and Acciciona. At Aeris, I have played many roles, the main ones where Change Management Leader and Product Engineer. In both positions, I was the client person-of-contact to receive customer’s requirements and to ensure they would be met, by analyzing the impacts and planning the implementation along with other teams. The
energy
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 field is a recent industry and amazes me been
part
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 of the history where we are creating our own standard and procedures as we grow. Brazil is a country with great potential to stand out within
this
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 area,
however
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, we still struggle with the lack of professionals to do knowledge transfer with the younger ones. For
this
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 reason, I would be delighted to be able to contribute somehow with that developing curve. I cherish to have international experiences and learn new. I have lived in Germany for 1 and a half
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 as a scholarship holder from the Brazilian Government and DAAD in 2014 and I was
part
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 of
High
Correct article usage
the High
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 School program in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 in 2008.
Consequently
Linking Words
, I speak Portuguese and English fluently, and Intermediate level of German and Spanish. Those experiences abroad enlightened me to respect and admire the world’s differences and cultures. Regarding my personal skills, I consider myself self-motivated, adaptable and a goal-oriented person. I am
also
Linking Words
 known for my organization and courteous
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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. I look after principles as honesty and ethic to guide life in all aspects. I believe that being
part
Use synonyms
 of the Master of Engineering in SESAM program would be life-changing to my professional and academic career. I would be
honored
Change the spelling
honoured
show examples
 to be
part
Use synonyms
 of it, and from me, you can expect a participant fully engaged and committed to the results and success.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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