Some people say that the main environmental problem pf our time is the loss of particular plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, the world is experiencing many environmental problems causing by human activities. Some
people
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believe that losing particular species of
plants
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and
animals
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is the main
problem
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affeting
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affecting

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environment while some opponents argue that there are more significant issues of
environment
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the environment

The noun phrase environment seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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.
This
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essay will discuss both views of these problems.
To begin
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with, the loss of some
plants
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and
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

caused by
deforestiation
Correct your spelling
deforestation

The word deforestiation is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

is the most important
problem
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.
Plants
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and
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

could greatly affect our environment. They are linked directly to the balance of
ecosystem
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the ecosystem
an ecosystem

The noun phrase ecosystem seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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.
For example
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, when
a
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the

It appears that the phrase a number does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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number of trees decrease,
carbondioxcide
Correct your spelling
carbon dioxide

The word carbondioxcide is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

(CO2) will increase leading to climate changes. Since photosynthesis of
plants
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needs CO2 as their crucial substance, the more shortage of
plants
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occours
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occurs

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, the more CO2 from
pollution
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is not eliminated. Another example is that animal dying is negative for our planet because it can cause other species to die according to
food
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the food

The noun phrase food chain seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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chain.
For instance
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, at the moment, over five
percent
Change the spelling
per cent

The spelling of percent is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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of insects
declines
Change the verb form
decline

The verb declines does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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every year.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

affect
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affects

The plural verb affect does not appear to agree with the singular subject This. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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directly to the lack of food sources for birds,
mamals
Correct your spelling
mammals

The word mamals is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

, and reptiles. Those
animals
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can be
extincted
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extinct

The word extincted is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

in the future.
However
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, some
people
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say that there are more environmental issues for
public
Add an article
the public

The noun phrase public seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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to concern
.
Change preposition
about.

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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The important one is
pollution
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. There are air
pullution
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pollution

The word pullution is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

from vehicles and toxic chemicals released from factories. To illustrate, toxic chemicals and air
pollution
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

negatively affect
people
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's health. They can cause
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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respiratory
Correct your spelling
disease

The word discase doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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discase
Correct your spelling
disease

The word discase doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun cancer in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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lung cancer. Another crucial
problemy
Correct your spelling
problem

The word problemy is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

is livestock farming which rapidly rises every year.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can cause
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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climate change because of
metane
Correct your spelling
methane

The word metane is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

gas releasing from
animals
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’ farts. In conclusion, some
people
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agree that
lossing
Correct your spelling
losing

The word lossing is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

plants
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and
animals
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
Change the verb form
are

The singular verb is does not appear to agree with the plural subject lossing plants and animals. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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main
Correct article usage
the main

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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environmental
problem
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

needed to be solved whereas others say that other
probles
Correct your spelling
problems

The word probles is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
pollution
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and farming are more important. I realize that the
problem
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that affects
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's health should be solved immediately and others
which
Correct pronoun usage
who

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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do not need
an
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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urgent treatment should be taken care
in
Change preposition
of in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a long term as well.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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