IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In the modern world,it is no longer necessary to use animals for food or use animals products for instance,clothing and medicines .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#world #animals #food #products #medicines
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As it is widely believed that God has invested the power in human beings to look after wildlife.I agree with the fact that it is our duty to protect and not to hunt
creature
Fix the agreement mistake
creatures
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 for food, apparel or testing in laboratories.In
this
Linking Words
 ever-changing world, everything has its substitute same goes for leather that we get from reptile skins and dairy items that mammals produce. In the forthcoming ,paragraph I shall explain my viewpoint briefly.
To begin
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 with, homosapients need protein and many other nutrients to be in a healthy state that was only available in
animals
Use synonyms
 centuries ago,due to
this
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caveman
Fix the agreement mistake
cavemen
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 used to hunt
animals
Use synonyms
 for food. ,
Linking Words
However
Correct your spelling
however
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 in today's ,world everything is replaceable thanks to agriculture and
such
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 nutrients can be found in pulses and other vegetables.
For example
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, chickpea and beans have a similar amount of nutrients is present in a chicken.
Similarly
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, Almond milk is used as a replacement for cow milk and contains the same amount of calcium.
Thus
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, the need for poultry farming is not required in these times.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,there are many sympathetic individuals and social bodies which are against animal abuse and fight for their rescue.Recently,it was trending on the news when two brothers created
leather
Correct article usage
a leather
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 handbag using a cactus plant eliminating the risk of killing reptiles for purses,shoes and jackets.
Secondly
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, many pharma companies have opted for cruelty-free testing and switched to plant-based testing. In conclusion, there are different products available for each and every requirement we receive from
animals
Use synonyms
therefore
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,I agree that we do not have to kill
animals
Use synonyms
 for our own selfish needs.
Submitted by simvirdi15 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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