Traditional ideas from older people about the way to live and behave are not helpful to young people and their futures. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #futures

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In the present day, with the advance of globalization and technology, many facts had changed in relation to the past.

Although

traditional

ideas

can help at times, older

people

need to realize that the way to live of young

people

now is completely different from years ago which in turn can result in stress and unbalance.

Therefore

I strongly agree traditional thoughts are not helpful to youngers.

This

essay will explain why these

ideas

can damage them and I will explain my point of view in detail.

First

of all, in the fast-paced

world

, both

women

and men are responsible for many activities and functions different from the past when

women

had no rights neither about their bodies nor about their choices and studies. Once society believed

this

idea was correct, for many years

this

tradition did not give voice to

women

and one of the reasons for

this

situation would be the strict education taught by our grandparents.

For instance

, today if a family keeps with

this

idea the future of girls will be hazarded take as an example many families trying to leave Afgan to build a better place to live for their children. Traditional

ideas

contribute to teaching about the past, but they cannot be the basis for the future.

Moreover

, nowadays

women

have more freedom to express their feelings,

in other words

, they should be inspirations to the

generations. Not only about the rights of

women

but

also

discrimination against different types of

people

cannot be corrected through ancient knowledge whereas individuals are different and need to be respected.

For example

, youngsters with creativity and free thoughts can change the

world

. The more the population deals with differences with respect, the better will be the place to live.

Hence

, I strongly agree traditional can endanger the future. In conclusion,

people

have opposite thoughts about the

world

and life, but ancient

ideas

cannot master a

world

so revolutionary.

This

essay argued the conservatism can damage the

generations and I explained my opinion in detail.

Submitted by larissafelipin on Fri Sep 03 2021

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

339 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Traditional values
Adaptation
Innovation
Interpersonal relationships
Timeless values
Modern challenges
Competitive
Hard work
Perseverance
Compliance
Suppression of creativity
Individuality
Progressive thinking
Wisdom
Elders
Past mistakes
Foundation
Community
Technology

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