A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most of the money was spent to cover the cost of the search for
oil
. Since making
oil
one of the main resources is not long-lasting, it is recommended to labour more on new types of
energy
resources,
such
as wind and solar. I strongly agree with
this
statement as
this
will lead to a lot of benefits
while
preventing harmful effects caused by
oil
consumption
. First of all,
this
alternative way is more sustainable, since these new types of
energy
are renewable and can be gained easily from Mother Nature.
For example
, we can simply benefit from the sun's
energy
, which is provided non-stop during the day in the form of solar
energy
to be absorbed by solar panels installed on top of our house's roofs as one of the main daily
energy
consumption
in living.
Furthermore
, a lot of negative effects caused by the constant
oil
consumption
on massive scales can be avoided by using renewable energies. Unfortunately, since
oil
has been used for many years until now by the majority of industries,
this
has caused an increase of greenhouse gases being released into the atmosphere, which has led to the thinning of the ozone layer and caused global warming effect on Earth.
Therefore
, before
this
got worse, a more sustainable approach needed to be considered to change our world's faith. In conclusion, spending more money to increase the usage of renewable energies can lead towards an environmentally-friendly way to consume
energy
daily. Not only that, but
this
can
also
prevent any destruction caused by
oil
consumption
.
Submitted by alisyashazzy on

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task achievement
Include more specific examples or case studies to strengthen your arguments. While the essay provides a general example of solar panels, more detailed or varied examples could enhance the argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Although the logical structure is generally good, more explicit transitional phrases could help clarify connections between ideas.
task achievement
The essay successfully presents a clear stance on the argument, articulating a strong agreement towards renewable energy investment.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay, reinforcing the argument made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Get your IELTS Essential Vocabulary List —
Topic Vocabulary:
  • finite
  • renewable energy sources
  • expenditure
  • compromise
  • sustainable
  • environmental impact
  • infrastructure
  • economic sustainability
  • dependency
  • fluctuating prices
  • stimulate
  • job creation
  • vested interests
  • transition
  • reluctance
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