Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measure are required.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measure

In various nations around the world, governments and policymakers are started to emphasise to the public the benefits of a healthy

lifestyle

However

, there is a numerous of

people

argue that by increasing the

sports

facilities

are not the wisely solution, whereas others support on it. From my perspective,

sports

facilities

and other measurements should be working together in order to improve public health in the future. In

this

essay, I will describe both views and evaluate my description. There are several pros by introduced

sports

facilities

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. One of the most significant is public will be supervised by the instructor during the

exercise

This

is because, every

exercise

will be conducted by a few instructors, so their body posture will be monitored closely as well as their diet.

For example

people

who have an intention to lose weight will be weekly weight body by the gym instructor before they started to

exercise

As a result

, the chance of not carrying a healthy

lifestyle

will be below.

In addition

, introducing the

sports

facilities

around the resident's playground is the best ideal.

This

is because

people

can bring along the kids to relax at the playground and at the same time, they can do some activities using the

sports

equipment.

For example

people

who dislike signing up for a package at the gym centre will be attracted to the gym

facilities

constructed at the playground.

As a result

this

will slowly be adapted to the

people

who working office hours or old generation

people

On the other hand

, other solutions that will be effective in creating an awareness among the public about a healthy

lifestyle

will be launched

Add an article

the

show examples

campaign.

For example

, the scientists can have a talk about the importance of self-hygiene, or the importance of

exercise

weekly among all the categories and many more.

Consequently

people

who have heard the talk will slowly comply with the scientists' talk and eventually improve their healthy

lifestyle

Moreover

, the government should encourage the media corp to publish the news or information about the pros of maintaining a healthy

lifestyle

in a person. Nowadays, many

people

are engaging with their gadgets throughout the day and night time, so released the news via apps or online will be the most effective way. To sum up, there are several ways to create awareness among the public on improving the healthy

lifestyle

. Government and other relevant sectors should work together in order to achieve the outcomes.

Submitted by tehmaylean on Sun Sep 05 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

411 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measure are required.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Childhood obesity has become a pressing issue in many societies

At the present time,the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults,compared with the number of older people. do the advantages of this sitation outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays young people know less about traditions and culture than in the past. What are the reasons for it? Is this a positive development or a negative development?

Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?