IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The crime rate in urban areas is usually much higher than in rural areas. Why is this? What can be done to address the problem of crime?

#crime #rate #areas #address
In recent times, it has been evidently witnessed that there is a surge in the crime rate in
cities
,
in contrast
 to countryside areas. There are several reasons for
this
 and to ameliorate the issue certain steps can be taken in
this
 direction which will be explicated in
this
 essay. The
first
 and foremost reason for the surge in criminal activities is the soaring
population
.
In other words
, with the rise in the number of people in ,
cities
 there will be a hike in the unemployment rate which cannot be seen in the case of underdeveloped places. Indeed, individuals of developed regions have a desire to live an opulent lifestyle, but due to work constrain they opt for illicit ways to earn money
such
 as theft, burglaries, murder and many more to mention. Whereas residents of rural regions believe in sober living.
For example
, data obtained from police headquarter reveals that 78% of crimes are committed by youngsters to full fil luxurious desires of their life partner.
Thus
, a keenness to live a luxurious lifestyle, as well as a lack of job opportunities, add fuel to the fire. To curb the issue, there should be an implementation of stringent laws so that it would create fear in the mind of the person prior to the commencement of any sort of heinous crime.
Moreover
, there should be a restraint on the
population
 of immigrants as the majority of the urban
population
 comprises immigrants. Apart from
this
, adjacent areas of
cities
 can be developed to generate employment opportunities.
For instance
, the areas in the vicinity of Noida are developed to cater for the needs of the growing
population
 eventually, causes a decline in the crime rate.
Therefore
, the formation and implementation of rules and extension of
cities
 are some of the remedies to mitigate the problem. In compendium, to reduce the unlawful act norms should be implemented and job opportunities should be created by the government to reduce the unemployment ratio.
Submitted by sangeeta252618 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: