IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think sending criminals to prison is not an effective way to deal with them. Education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #criminals #prison #education
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Nowadays, crime rates are
raising
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rising
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 globally. Everyone is aware
about
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of
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 the penalties they receive if they offend any
mistakes
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. Despite
this
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,
people
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 are still offensive. So, I strongly disagree with the view of stopping jail punishment for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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criminals.
This
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 essay will discuss
about
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apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 topic in detail in the following paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, irrespective of qualifications
people
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 are doing crimes. So, educating the
people
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 after committing some
mistakes
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 will not be
worth
Correct pronoun usage
itworth
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. Perhaps, assisting the person to realize his
mistakes
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 can bring some positive
change
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 in him.
However
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, chances are less because
,
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apply
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 many are re_offending
same
Correct article usage
the same
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mistakes
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 after knowing about the intensity of that. To summarize, not all persons can
change
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 by education. To continue with, many are doing crimes to seek power in society. So, these humans will not
change
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 by training. Because they are more aware
about
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of
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 what they are doing and they are not afraid
also
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.
However
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,
these kind
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this kind
these kinds
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 of
people
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 should be punished without
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second
Add an article
a second
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 thought. To exemplify, Abhaya raped case victims were not even guilty
eventhough
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even though
, they were well known about the
cruelty
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the cruelty
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 of crime they had committed. So that, these categories of criminals should not
left
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leave
be left
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 alone without penalties. To sum up, we live in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 world, where humans lack humanity. So punishing them for their
mistakes
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 are the right option for realization.
However
Linking Words
, I disagree with the point that, training or education can
change
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 a criminal.
Submitted by divyahemakumar2017 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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