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Band 3

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.

#people #noise #amount
It is often argued that
level
Correct article usage
the level
show examples
 of
noise
 should be under tough control or
people
 may shout without any regulations.
This
 essay supports the idea that
noise
 is
source
Add an article
the source
a source
show examples
 of disturbance to other
people
 and should be punished. It is clear that city dwellers make a lot of
noise
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 while talking, driving or
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public meetings. So, in common it is an acceptable action to shout
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 concerts, speaking loudly with friends or colleagues, even motorcyclists and drivers are not worried about their
noise
. In
Kazakhstan
Add a comma
,Kazakhstan
show examples
 there a many concerts and weddings that make a large amount of
noise
 and no one complains.
However
,
noise
 is
source
Add an article
the source
a source
show examples
 of disturbance to other
people
 at
nights
Fix the agreement mistake
night
show examples
, mornings and evenings. Everyone has time to have rest after work or studying,
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
this
 time is from 6 pm to 8 am.
This
 relaxation time can be interrupted by
Correct article usage
a high-level
show examples
high-level
Correct your spelling
high level
show examples
 of
noise
 outside, due to that stressful situation
people
 are often tired and get diseases as a consequence. When
me
Change the pronoun
I
show examples
 and my family lived in
populated
Correct article usage
a populated
show examples
 area my parents and siblings could not have enough sleep in there, because of cars, shouting teenagers and adults.
Therefore
, we always had low-level of motivation and life pleasure. In conclusion,
noise
 is
controversial
Add an article
a controversial
show examples
 topic, because it is hard to distinguish where
noise
 leads to disturbance or
complains
Replace the word
complaints
show examples
 and should be regulated.
Nevertheless
, punishing is the only way out to make
people
’s
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 without
noise
 and stress.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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