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Writing Samples
Band 4

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#people #children #life #outweigh
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In my opinion, the given statement stands partially true. Many of the married members of any family, prefer to have
children
Use synonyms
 at
their
Change the word
an
show examples
 early
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
. Over the period, the decisions are changed. There could be many reasons for taking
such
Linking Words
 decisions.
For example
Linking Words
, the
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
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 in the cost of living. Due to increased prices of all the basic needs, people are finding it difficult in raising them, providing them
the
Add the preposition
with the
show examples
 basic
education
Use synonyms
, and taking care of them. I believe
this
Linking Words
 is the major reason behind taking
such
Linking Words
decision
Correct article usage
a decision
show examples
. Talking about the advantages and disadvantages, there is a wide scope for advantages being outweighed. Planning for
children
Use synonyms
 after
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
 period of time, from the marriage day,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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gives the couple/family a lot of time, to think about the future.
Also
Linking Words
 in laying a path for their (
children
Use synonyms
) lives. Parents will be able to plan according to their financial status, balancing the requirements. It
given
Add the auxiliary verb
gave
has given
show examples
 an advantage of planning their
education
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, the best institution to chose, and
also
Linking Words
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
strong support with some savings made. Talking about the disadvantages of having
children
Use synonyms
 at
early
Add an article
an early
show examples
 age, it becomes a big challenge in taking up
such
Linking Words
 big responsibility. One should become more
stabalized
Correct your spelling
stabilized
stabilised
 in terms of finance, and ready to spend a lot on
education
Use synonyms
 and other expenses. Being a family of 5 members, with 2 siblings, I really found it very difficult for my parents in rising us. Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they were not financially stable, and they had to make many debts for providing us
all
Change preposition
with all
show examples
 the basic needs like clothes, shelter (rented house),
education
Use synonyms
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
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, etc. It took them almost 20 years for
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to clear all those debts.
Hence
Linking Words
 I believe, and
advice
Replace the word
advise
show examples
 to the point of having
children
Use synonyms
 at right time, when
couple
Add an article
the couple
a couple
show examples
 are really ready to take the responsibility.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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