IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
Humanity has been experiencing numerous problems since it is existence on the earth. As well as the causes, which
people
 have been suffering from,
people
 concern about the creation of the dwellers in the
world
 and outside the
world
.
Therefore
, they are always searching. Obviously, science is the most important factor that contributes to
people
 solving problems.
Although
 some believe that scientific information should not be shared because of their values, others believe that the main aim of the information is the providing comfort to humanity.
Additionally
, scientific research should be open to all societies. According to the majority of communities, scientists have been struggling with experiments to find causes
such
 as diseases, geographical discoveries, and other inventions.
To begin
 with, they spend lots of their time examining.
For example
, laboratory experiments can make a long time to find treatment.
Moreover
, they consume a big amount of money. To illustrate, the materials and equipment, which are used in order to invent new information can be unaffordable. In
this
 context, they do not desire to share the results of the researches. I strongly believe that whether articles are more valuable or not, they should be published freely. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the only purpose of science is to serve humanity. Particularly, medical research should be stated freely because illnesses threaten the entire
world
. As we know, novel viruses have been influencing every individual.
For instance
, Spanish influenza killed more than 50 million
people
 around the
world
. İn conclusion, publishing academic articles may collaborate with
people
 to cope with challenges.
Submitted by evren on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: