Nowadays it is possible to move ocean creatures from their natural habitat at sea and have them placed in amusement parks for the purpose of people’s recreation. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

8.5 / 9

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Introduction

In recent years, people have been inclined to spend their holidays by visiting amusement

parks

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because they are able to explore various kinds of

ocean

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creatures

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in one place. Some argue that it is beneficial to the public if these

animals

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are moved from the

ocean

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and placed in

parks

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while others disagree with

this

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contention.

This

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essay will discuss why the advantages do not outweigh the disadvantages.

Body paragraph 1

Critics of

this

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opinion are of the belief that keeping sea

creatures

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in amusement

parks

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is more advantageous for the purpose of people's recreation.

Firstly

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, the public of all ages can discover unique species and learn about their behaviours, characteristics.

Secondly

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, they are likely to experience the connection with mother nature itself. To illustrate, children might be the most beneficial age group because they can easily remember and identify these

animals

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by looking at them in

parks

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rather than watching visuals in books.

Therefore

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, some agree with placing

ocean

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creatures

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parks

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Body paragraph 2

On the contrary

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, others do not support

this

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statement since not all recreational areas are well developed to be considered a convenient habitat for

ocean

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wildlife.

Additionally

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, they might be kept in captivity.

Consequently

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, it may hamper their growth and health.

Furthermore

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, moving

animals

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from the

ocean

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will probably create an imbalance in the environmental life cycle. For an instance, recent research shows that in the pacific

ocean

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, the number of salmon fish have decreased dramatically which affected other sea

animals

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' food chains.

Hence

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, some opine that

this

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movement might have more demerits than benefits.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

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the

ocean

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wildlife in amusement

parks

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can be used for people's recreation, it may disturb the environmental life cycle and deteriorate

animals

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' health who are in cages. In my opinion, it is the government's responsibility to impose strict rules on the park authorities so that they keep

creatures

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in a suitable atmosphere, provide healthy food and do not move them from the sea to

parks

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above a certain limit.

jaimineekataria123

Sep 8, 2021

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

327 words

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Nowadays it is possible to move ocean creatures from their natural habitat at sea and have them placed in amusement parks for the purpose of people’s recreation. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.To what extent do you agree or disagree?