IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people believe that the good leaders are born, whereas others hold the opinion that the leadership qualities could be obtained during the life. Who represents the good qualities indeed?

#people #leaders #leadership #qualities #life
Leadership
 quality is one of the key features in which a
person
 could be able to exaggerate self-esteem. While there are some who believe that it is a virtue that a
person
 receives inherently, others believe that a
person
 needs to wait throughout their lifetime expecting
that
Change the determiner
that quality
those qualities
show examples
qualities
. In my point of view, the
person
 who has profound
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
leadership
qualities
 is the latter one I mentioned above. In
this
 essay, I will explain why I agree with that with clear explanations. Many people are struggling with their teams or group of members with each other
as a result
 of not selecting a
person
 who has patience as a
leadership
 quality to lead them because all the members in the group or team will
consequently
 lead to a disastrous and unsuccessful position.
For instance
, impatient leaders make sudden decisions and change them frequently as they are not patient enough to get decisions going through exact
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
show examples
 processes and get them right at once. Nobody can improve
qualities
 from
born
Add a missing verb
being born
show examples
 themselves. Everybody
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to develop
such
qualities
 through their virtues along the time
accordingly
.
On the other hand
, only ones with more experiences in their real
lifetime
Replace the word
life
show examples
 tend to lead people better than other people who believed to be better from born.
This
 is because experiences inevitably lead to self-development through series of incidents and situations going throughout
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
daily life. In conclusion, it is vague that a
person
 with a good
leadership
 quality entirely depends on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personality skills and not on inheritance at all.
Submitted by sandhb89 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: