IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible, while others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #education #children #years #age
Some people believe that face-to-face
education
 shouldn't begin earlier than
usual
Add an article
the usual
show examples
age
 of kids,
whilts
Correct your spelling
whilst
while
 others argued with the statement that
children
 should
educated
Change the verb form
educate
be educated
show examples
 in the
schools
 before 7 years of
age
. It is argued that they should not go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schools
 until their seven.
This
 essay will discuss both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
views and give reasons about when
children
 should start getting knowledge in
education
 places. The formal
education
 that
learned
Add a missing verb
is learned
show examples
 is difficult to understand for young kids.All of the subjects and
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
 are made for 7 years old
children
.
That is
 why
this
 kind of knowledge
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 easy to learn for
youngers
Correct your spelling
younger
show examples
 one.If they start to study
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
their
Change the word
an
show examples
 earlier
age
,they will face
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
stress in middle
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
Children
 until school
age
 should spend free
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 with
parients
Correct your spelling
parents
patients
 or
friens
Correct your spelling
friends
 by making life more enjoyable.
On the other hand
,starting study from younger
age
 might help to easily find in what subject group they interested.Many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
humans like to goof around ,in the
end
Add the comma(s)
,end
show examples
 lost their gold times.Starting formal
education
 earlier than usual is
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
 to give more available information for them
For instance
,
child
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
 may interested in sciences subject and can develop the better skills than others one. To
concude
Correct your spelling
conclude
,
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
 both opinions of humanity have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 positive sides.Not
starting
Add the particle
tostarting
show examples
 go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
 until the 7 years is
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better because of
difficult
Correct article usage
the difficult
show examples
 information to take for young ones.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Social interactions
  • Formative years
  • Curiosity
  • Structured environments
  • Preschool activities
  • Unstructured play
  • Developmental pace
  • Emotional and social skills
  • Undue stress and pressure
  • Natural development
  • Informal learning methods
What to do next:
Look at other essays: