Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #methods

Many argue that having a

home

education for

children

is the best method to introduce

much

Change the quantifier

many

show examples

important skills to them.

On the other hand

, others might think that there is no substitution for the importance of

school

learning. From my point of view, I believe that both

system

Change to a plural noun

systems

show examples

can benefit positively for each child, and in

this

essay, I will discuss both constructive effects on

children

mentality namely increase family bonding and build maximum academic potential.

To begin

with, one of the most positive impacts

Change preposition

show examples

having

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

home

learning sessions for young individuals is they are able to learn things from their loved

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

one

Fix the agreement mistake

ones

show examples

and it increases family bonding. Rather than learning social ethics attitudes from people that they just met like

school

teachers, with

home

Add an article

the home

a home

show examples

educational

system

they will easily accept the study material since their parents will be one of their guides.

Change preposition

This

show examples

this

methodology, because

Change preposition

apply

show examples

frequent interaction between them, it

resulting

Add the preposition

inresulting

fromresulting

show examples

a tighter bonding. On the flip side, formal

school

educational

system

known for their own stable curriculums, and

this

enable them to maximize ones academic's potential.

Children

surely will learn a lot of compulsory subjects in

school

including maths, science, and history. They will learn each of those subjects from a teacher that already specialized in those disciplines,

thus

they will learn from the best.

Furthermore

, they will learn to compete with their classmates, and it forces them to always give their best.

Therefore

school

Add an article

the school

show examples

environment is the perfect place to polish

children

true potential. To conclude, in my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

both methods have their own positiveness, while the

home

system

emphasizes more to child mental state by making a good connection between

children

and the parents, the

school

educational scheme can enhance ones academic ability.

Submitted by muhamad.herwindo on Sun Sep 12 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

personalized learning
cater
flexible schedule
extracurricular activities
safe learning environment
bullying
peer pressure
socialization
diversity awareness
structured environment
discipline
punctuality
resources and facilities
communication skills
teamwork
specialized subjects
experts

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Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Some people believe that the environmental impacts of air transport outweigh its benefits in food importation. To what extent do you agree? Provide reasons for your answer and include relevant examples.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is becoming increasingly popular for school leavers to take a year off (a gap year) before going to university. Do the advantages of this outweigh any disadvantages?

Topic 2: Some peole think the government should focus on improving the economy of the country. Other people think that government should focus on social services such as health and education programs. Which statement do you agree with? Explain and provide examples to support your opinion.