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Band 7.5

Some people believe that progress is always good. Others believe in preserving tradition. Which do you think is more important and why? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

#people #progress #tradition #support
In
this
 21st century, there is a stride at an extensive scale and a segment of society supports
this
 change. While others reckon in retaining old customs. Personally, I favour the former view with some reservations.
Firstly
, the advancement in most of the aspects is considered to be positive, owing to fact that it brings the latest ideas and changes which are beneficial for mankind.
In other words
, the development in certain sectors
such
 as the medical sector, defence, corporate and science areas proves to be a boon for the human race. Indeed, in the field of medicine and research due to
up-gradation
Add a comma
,up-gradation
show examples
 there is a cure of fatal diseases eventually, causes a surge in life expectancy rate
such
 as Covid-19 treatment is possible with the assistance of fast-paced research. Due to
this
 vaccine is formed, which helps in the prevention of the illness.
Thus
, in umpteen ,ways progress has a myriad of advantages. Adding
further
, the rituals of society which are turmoil for individuals has been eradicated. Not only
this
, there are several other customs which have been lost and brings positive changes in humans lives, especially in the case of the women’s
such
 as remarriage of widows, end of sati practice and so on.
On the contrary
, there is a downside of
this
 as it puts several languages and cultures in jeopardy. Ergo, most of them are on verge of extinction and the nation’s which are
initially
 acknowledged for their customs and rituals have lost uniqueness due to globalization. To illustrate, in the past younger ones touches the feet of elders in the morning every day, but
this
 practice has been declined to a greater extent nowadays.
Hence
, for ,females progress is a blessing in enormous aspects. In compendium, I reiterate that progress is a long term process and is beneficial for humans.
Although
, it comes at a cost of vanishing certain social values.
Submitted by sangeeta252618 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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