Some people say that the purpose of education for individuals is to be useful to the society, while others argue that the purpose is to fulfill personal ambitions of an individual. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #purpose #education #individuals #society #ambitions

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It is considered by some

people

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that

education

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for a person is in line with

individual’s

Correct article usage

an individual’s

show examples

personal ambitions, whereas there are others who think that it should be helpful to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

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. While

education

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is used for the community, I believe that

education

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will be better for the individual

people

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to improve their

knowledge

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. On the one hand, there are a lot of good ways to use

education

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for

society

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– it is to share

with

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apply

show examples

their opinion and

knowledge

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with other

people

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This

Linking Words

is essential to gain important information,

such

Linking Words

as professional skills and cultural norms.

For example

Linking Words

, there are teachers who share their own experiences. Students take the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

most interesting and the most significant information from teachers in order to know a lot. So, it will be more useful for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

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On the other hand

Linking Words

education

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take

Change the verb form

takes

show examples

people

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’s 11 or 12 years not to waste their

knowledge

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society

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, but to be successful for themselves. In

Kazakhstan

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,Kazakhstan

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there are many schools that can help to find their careers that will be

Add an article

a benefit

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benefit

Replace the word

beneficial

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for their future.

For instance

Linking Words

, in NIS schools’ student-graduates who study at Nazarbayev University, in order to improve their own

knowledge

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, work in the best place where they have a good salary.

Therefore

Linking Words

education

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should help

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

to realise their personal ambitions and dreams. In conclusion, I will say that there are many good ways to help

society

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with

education

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although

Linking Words

teaching will be better for improving

people

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's own

knowledge

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also

Linking Words

helps

people

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to be more responsible and useful for development.

Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on Wed Sep 15 2021

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

preparation
beneficial
society
skills
knowledge
civic responsibility
active participation
social initiatives
societal issues
solutions
specialized professions
personal growth
self-fulfillment
passions
interests
potential
talents
job prospects
financial stability
balance
meaningful
foundation
emphasis

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Some people say that the purpose of education for individuals is to be useful to the society, while others argue that the purpose is to fulfill personal ambitions of an individual. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In some cities of the world, cars are replacing bicycles. However, in some cities, bicycle are replacing cars. What are the reason for this for these developments? In your opinion, which one is better?

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviours to children?

Happiness is considered very important in life,why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness. Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your own knowledge and experiences.