in the modern world it is possible to shop, work and communicate with people via the internet and live without face to face contact with other. it is possitive or negative development in the opinion ?

many
people
believe that the development of the
internet
makes
people
's
life
much
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
easier
such
as shopping, working or even though meeting friend without face to face. in my perspective,
people
must balance the time that they use it. on the one hand, there is no doubt that
people
are living in modernization and innovation of the world with the extreme development of the
internet
. because of that,
people
also
handle an abundance of problems without leaving their
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
. living in
busy
Add an article
a busy
the busy
show examples
life
, it is
such
a difficulty when they want to hang out and go shopping.
moreover
, the
internet
is play
Change the verb form
is playing
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
fundamental role
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
contacting
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their friends despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a
Change the word
their
show examples
huge distance.
for example
, because of
pandemic
Add an article
the pandemic
show examples
period,
people
must do every
activities
Change to a singular noun
activity
show examples
on
thr
Correct your spelling
the
internet
which becomes
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
way to receive outside
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
.
on the other hand
, with the widespread of the
internet
,
people
absolutely become slaver of the
internet
, they will
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
not only the ability of
multisolving
Correct your spelling
multi solving
,
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apply
show examples
but
also
less
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fewer
show examples
confidences when they need real meetings in daily
life
. nowadays the young generation
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
quite lazy, they always
saty
Correct your spelling
stay
say
at home and use the
internet
as
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
tool to meet
demand
Add an article
the demand
show examples
for everything. it is obvious that they will less sensitive of
life
as a robot which is attributed to the fact that their
life
is definitely tedious.
for instance
, in Vietnam the percentage of children who have mental problems is high which is
propotional
Correct your spelling
proportional
with the
internet
growth. they don't have any friends, and keep using the
internet
all the time. in conclusion,
people
will be accepted for both pros and cons of the
internet
, but they must have to adapt and control their responsibilities hat help them avoid the
internet
's damnation
Submitted by plt13112001 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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