IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

• Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #job #satisfaction #security
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Some
people
 think that
job
satisfaction
 should be prioritised in
job seeking
Add a hyphen
job-seeking
show examples
 while others believe that it is not important as
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
stable employment. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both ideas. On the one hand, there are many reasons many
people
 often opt for
job
satisfaction
 rather than a fixed
job
. Some highly prioritise monetary benefits
such
 as salary enhancements or strive for a relaxing working environment or flexible working schedule so that they are willing to consider changing their
career
 path once a better
career
 option is available. Of course, I think that there is nothing wrong if
people
 crave
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an ideal
job
 that gives them pleasure and motivation.
On the other hand
, many think that we should pursue a stable life-long
career
 as there is no
satisfaction
 to expect at work. Their arguments often are based on the examples of many taking a
job
 for life because of a stable income or others simply sticking with a
job
 despite being low-paid because
that is
 the
job
 they want to do. I do not agree; I think that these
people
 consider a permanent
job
 as their
career
 expectation might be reasonable and realistic and are more importantly satisfied by
this
job
.
In addition
, many
people
 are unable to find contentment in anything they do because they have an unrealistic expectation of
job
satisfaction
such
 as a position with a high remuneration without
pressure
Add an article
the pressure
show examples
 that it is impossible for employers to offer reasonably. Even having a good
job
, these
people
 will quit their
job
 and find a so-called ideal opportunity.
Therefore
, the suggestion to be stable might not be welcomed by those
job
 hoppers unless they expect more realistically
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
job
satisfaction
. In conclusion, I believe that
job
satisfaction
 is the most essential factor for most
people
 to take a
job
.
Also
,
job
 security is only more important once we find a
job
 that satisfies our expectations, provided that we do not expect unrealistically
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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