IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#animals #place #st #century #waste #resources
Some people argue that spending money on the protection of wild
animals
 is pointless. I completely disagree with
this
 opinion. From my point of view, it is absurd to argue that wild
animals
 have no place in
21st
Change the article
the 21st
show examples
 century. I believe that wild
animals
 are a part of the earth so we have no right to allow or encourage the extinction of any species.
Furthermore
, there is no reason why we should let
animals
 die out. Others say that wild
animals
 take up a lot of
land
Change to a plural noun
lands
show examples
. I think it is
wrong
Correct article usage
a wrong
show examples
 idea because there is a lot of
land
Change to a plural noun
lands
show examples
 for us to live with wild
animals
.
Secondly
, I disagree with idea that protecting wild
animals
 is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 of resources. I think one of our problems is
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
 of natural habitats because it is incredibly important for people and it ensures the survival of wild
animals
.
This
 problem is indispensable for both. The natural habitats produce oxygen for people and stabilise the earth’s climate. So if we destroyed these areas, the costs of solving problems would far out with the costs of conservation. In conclusion, by protecting wild
animals
 and their habitats, we maintain the natural balance of all life on earth.
Submitted by Thanh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: