The mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, have great influence in shaping people's ideas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people say that the
media
platforms
such
as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
television,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
radio and newspapers have a significant impact on shaping people’s thoughts. I strongly agree with the statement above, which I will extend the reasons in the
next
paragraph.
First
of all, the reason why the mass
media
influence the way we think is that we perceive these
media
information including news and the advertisement regularly. The
media
advertisements often pop up on our phones, which the message of it is trying to persuade you to change the way you think little by little, embedding it in your thoughts.
For instance
, you are on the phone and some random advertisement about toothpaste pops up many times. The
next
time you going shopping, the advertisement you saw early on will come to your mind, making that random toothpaste another choice of product you might be buying.
Secondly
, the
media
companies hire celebrities or internet idols to lure the customer’s attention, especially the kids in the present day often viewing celebrities and idols as their role models.
This
makes it easy for the
media
to lead youngsters’ minds and slowly adjust them the way they intend to.
For example
, imagine a child watching a cartoon of his favourite hero, Spiderman, with excitement, after seeing Spiderman defeating the villain in the show, the character brings up a superhero drink.
Therefore
, the
next
time the boy goes to a grocery store, he will likely ask his parents to buy him the superhero drink he saw on the television show because the boy wants to imitate his favourite hero. From the reason above we can conclude that the
media
have a major impact on how we think in our everyday life due to the
frequency
Add a comma
,frequency
show examples
we watch mass
media
and the use of
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
figures, making it hard for us to not be affected by the influence of these platforms.
This
is why it is vital for us to separate what is conceivable and reasonable for those trying to manipulate our
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
.
Submitted by chompunoot.raj on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: