IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Youngsters have lots of problems but their problems are often ignored by the people running the country. Give solution to the problems faced by young generation.

#youngsters #lots #people #country #generation
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of a person who will be running the
country
Use synonyms
 in the nearly future is
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
adolescence
Replace the word
adolescent
show examples
 in the present day. Undeniable that
youngster
Use synonyms
 is more likely intelligence than older people. In my
oppinion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, The government should designate a way to gather all of the youth's ideas and pull them up to collaborate with an adult.
Hence
Linking Words
, the following essay is an explanation of my solution for breaking the barrier. In some
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
, People who are empowered to determine a policy of
country
Use synonyms
 still thinking that the only one
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
responsibility of
Use synonyms
youngster
Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
show examples
 is learning at school which is
ancient
Add an article
an ancient
show examples
 idea, Even though the new generation is capable to do the right thing equivalent to an adult
such
Linking Words
 as a
youngster
Use synonyms
 should be involved to consider in education policy or offering their ideas at least.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Proving a stage for an argument in a relevant issue to a
youngster
Use synonyms
 which there could be held by the government.
for instance
Linking Words
, a student could
be involve
Change the verb form
involve
show examples
discussion
Change preposition
in discussion
show examples
 about
rule
Add an article
the rule
show examples
 of student's uniform that wearing a student's uniform when they are at school is still necessary clothes or not
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 their parents have to buy new uniform for their child in each a
couple
Add the preposition
ofcouple
show examples
 years,
Consequently
Linking Words
, a family must be responsible for inessential living costs.
Conclusion
Change preposition
In conclusion
show examples
, there are several methods to make an involvement between empower people and new generation depend on
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
prioritized social issues by a government.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 essay definitely offers a way to collaborate with them in order to correctly develop the
country
Use synonyms
 through the intense competition era.
Submitted by sohavething on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: