as is often that "Prevention is better than cure". For this reason, governments should spend national health budget more on the prevention of diseases than on treatment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#prevention #cure #reason #governments #health #budget #diseases #treatment

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It is that that the authority should invest in the national health budget on the

prevention

Use synonyms

of illness rather than the treatment because "

Prevention

Use synonyms

is better than cure". I completely support

this

Linking Words

idea in terms of many and prospects.

First

Linking Words

and foremost, the cost of

prevention

Use synonyms

is far cheaper than the therapy. Looking more closely, these days, the illness caused by daily customs is focused between youngsters.

This

Linking Words

is because their unhealthy life is possible to generate heavy diseases

such

Linking Words

as cancer in the future.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they must consider their health, and if they have unstable customs, it should be amended to protect their forthcoming life.

Additionally

Linking Words

, students are able to understand the healthy diet, the importance of sleepness, and workouts in their school as a class, so, it can say that the government already educates young generations about

prevention

Use synonyms

Secondly

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, teaching about diseases

such

Linking Words

as HIV is the only way to defend against genetic illnesses. The therapeutic treatment is not found with regard to illnesses as HIV and AIDS.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is able to prevent by paying attention to the risk. Thereby, all those should understand about

this

Linking Words

disease, and if they have opportunities to learn about it, they probably enable take care about it after

this

Linking Words

class. To sum up, the investment in

prevention

Use synonyms

is effective in that of treatments in order to reduce the cost of future care.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the public improves their healthy lifestyle which connects to be a long life and remain shape without heavy illnesses.

Submitted by ryoutafukamachi on Sat Sep 18 2021

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

251 words

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as is often that "Prevention is better than cure". For this reason, governments should spend national health budget more on the prevention of diseases than on treatment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many people think that regions affect a successful person. What is your opinion about the native region and accomplished person’s influence on the region he belongs to?

Many people lose their income due to CoVid19 pandemic. What solution that can do by government or individual to overcome this problem.

Some people think it is better for children to being to learn a foreign language at primary school than at secondary school. What’s your opinion? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion