IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Why Torurist visit the museum but loacal people dont visit and what can be done to attract moe people in museum

Museums are
the
Correct article usage
apply
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historical places, we can preserve the memories of our ancestors
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so that
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can be very useful for our
next
Linking Words
 generations. But
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 only tourists
visit
Use synonyms
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
these places but hardly local residence of that city visits the
people
Use synonyms
, for that there are so many reasons. There are different types
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
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 but,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 paragraph, will cover only the
museum
Use synonyms
 which
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 ancient
things
Use synonyms
, which hardly available to see in our daily life,
for
Linking Words
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
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 Maharana Pratap sword was 56 kg but
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 the weight of
sword
Add an article
the sword
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 is hardly 5 kgs even not more than that. There are different
things
Use synonyms
 which are very valuable. These museums
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 located in different cities and in suburban areas, as said that local
people
Use synonyms
 rarely
visit
Use synonyms
 the
museum
Use synonyms
 and only most of the travellers or tourists
visit
Use synonyms
 the
museum
Use synonyms
, the new hungry
people
Use synonyms
 always collect
Use synonyms
museum related
Add a hyphen
museum-related
show examples
 data and the
people
Use synonyms
 who
works
Change the verb form
work
show examples
 on historical subjects,
also
Linking Words
 collect maximum i
nformation
Correct your spelling
information
 about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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ancient
things
Use synonyms
. Because local
people
Use synonyms
stays
Change the verb form
stay
show examples
 in
same
Add an article
a same
the same
show examples
 suburban area, and they probably have most the information related to the
museum
Use synonyms
things
Use synonyms
, and other hand
tourist
Change the wording
tourists
show examples
 are new every time
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
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therefore
Linking Words
 it seems tourist
visit
Use synonyms
 the
museum
Use synonyms
 but local
people
Use synonyms
dose
Correct your spelling
does
show examples
 not and I
am not agree
Change the verb form
do not agree
show examples
 with it. To attract
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more
people
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Add an article
the museum
a museum
show examples
, there are several ways,
for
Linking Words
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
 “Prime Minter Narendra Modi” has inaugurated the statue of unity it is the biggest statue in the world, it has different representational
things
Use synonyms
 and media that explain everything
in
Change preposition
apply
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very simple ,and 3D as well as 5D manner.
People
Use synonyms
 have good food and for
relaxation
Add a comma
,relaxation
show examples
 there are different staying facilities are there. I would suggest
to modernise
Change the verb form
modernising
show examples
are
Correct your spelling
our
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Add an article
a museum
show examples
 in
such
Linking Words
 a way that
people
Use synonyms
 love to
visit
Use synonyms
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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