Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to leam how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time #leam

Some individuals argue that parents should stimulate their infants to participate in

coletive

Correct your spelling

collective

organizations during their leisure time, whereas others consider that it is vital for juveniles

evolve

Fix the infinitive

to evolve

show examples

their own occupation by themselves. In

this

essay, I am going to debate both points of view, and

then

explain why I believe

children

should socialize frequently with other persons. There are two main reasons to defend activities in

group

Add an article

the group

a group

show examples

Firstly

, relatives declare that

this

practice can improve social

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

, helping

children

surpass traumas or lack of confidence.

For instance

, artistic groups can teach how to deal with shyness or anxiety.

Secondly

, being members of

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

teams can teach new physical abilities to young people while they boost their

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

conditions,

such

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

cardiorespiratory function.

Hence

, enrolling them in extra schooling activities should be the best option to occupy their free time. On the other

hands

Fix the agreement mistake

hand

show examples

, opponents explain that

children

require some periods by themselves to understand their emotions.

Furthermore

, young persons should have their own to figure out solutions to their fears and personal difficulties by themselves.

Moreover

, various

pediatricians

Change the spelling

paediatricians

show examples

claim that, throughout loneliness, infants will be able to develop their independence and self-esteem, which are indispensable to adult life. In conclusion, both arguments have their merits.

Nonetheless

, on balance, I think human being requires constantly socialization with others in order to evolve social skills and wellness. Considering that childhood is the period of life when individuals are more

disponible

Correct your spelling

responsible

to sharing experiences and learnings, I strongly suggest intense and constant coexistence between

children

in order to improve their physical and psychological characteristics.

Submitted by debi_quistina on Sat Sep 18 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people believe that tourism promotes the economy while other argue that tourism destroy the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion
It is considered by several individuals that tourism enriches the economic sector. In contrast, there are others who think that the tourism make harmful effects on the environment. In my opinion, I believe that there are some bad behaviours from tourists while are visiting other countries, while they are playing a role in flourishing the economy in every visited country.
7
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Some individuals claim that there is a significant accomplishment of advertising in persuading people to buy goods, while others believe that advertising is so regular and human beings do not pay attention to it at present.
5
band
Write about the following topic: Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
The amount of available sugar in processed foods and drinks is growing to be a globally concerning issue. There is a consensus that the price of these products should be increased so that people would not be able to consume them on a regular basis. This, however, is not a practical way to approach this problem due to its temporary results and illogical rationale.
4.5
band
More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problems over-relinace on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
The private car as their course means of transportation is relied on by most of the people. Nowadays, the amount of cars will increase and it will have more impact on the environment. This essay will envoy about problem and solution for people who use a car as a private car.
6
band
Some people prefer to provide help and support directly to those in need. Others however prefer to give money to national and international charitable organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The debate over how people should help others in need is ongoing, with some viewing them merely as people should donate to national and international charities, while others argue that it is better to give help and support directly to those in need. Both perspectives have valid points and understanding these viewpoints is crucial in forming a balanced opinion.

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to leam how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that tourism promotes the economy while other argue that tourism destroy the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion

More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problems over-relinace on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Some people prefer to provide help and support directly to those in need. Others however prefer to give money to national and international charitable organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.