IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

It will be better for both society and individuals if driverless cars—cars can drive themselves— become more widely used. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#society #individuals #driverless #cars—cars #drive #themselves—
In contemporary society, a large number of
people
 choose
driverless
cars
 rather than driving by themselves. Personally, I believe that the widespread use of autonomous
cars
 is more beneficial for society and
people
 and I would give reasons in the following paragraphs. For a variety of reasons, the effects of
driverless
cars
 have deleterious impacts on the whole society.
For example
,
people
 might gradually lose the capability to drive which ability is an essential technique. Controlling by the computer system,
drivers
generally
Add a missing verb
are generally
show examples
 not required to know how to drive.
However
，
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
 autonomous vehicles may not work well with pedestrians. Nobody has figured out how to determine what a pedestrian would do. In
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
, if
drivers
 lose
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
driving skills, they could be in serious danger where both
drivers
 and
pedestrian
Fix the agreement mistake
pedestrians
show examples
 are
injury
Change the noun form
injuries
show examples
. What is more? It is well documented that the unemployment rate may increase in
this
 area. There is a movement that says
people
 do not need public transportation anymore with autonomous vehicles because
cars
 could follow each other so closely.
As a result
, many transit jobs
such
 as uber
drivers
, taxi
drivers
 and so on would be out of jobs or would disappear because
people
 prefer to choose
driverless
cars
 which provides more convenience for citizens. Nerveless,
driverless
cars
 would bring numerous benefits for individuals.
Firstly
,
this
 is could free
driver’s
Correct article usage
the driver’s
show examples
 hand which allow
people
 to do other useful activities. For those take the car to work or school and take the car to go home, and
then
 pick them up at the end of the day. Doing things in the car
such
 as doing tasks or chatting with others is a good way to save time. A
second
benefits
Change the noun form
benefit
show examples
 is that autonomous vehicles is likely to a dramatic reduction in accidents which increases owner’s safety. Many of the devices
such
 as automatic barking, collision-avoidance systems, blind-spot monitoring and lane controls would help
people
 achieve a lot fewer traffic death.
Therefore
, Self-driving
cars
 can trigger sensors quickly than
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 that
people
 would take a few seconds for them to make sense to stop in dangerous situations. All in all,
although
driverless
cars
 would bring more benefits for
people
 who are busy at work or be afraid of driving by themselves, it leads to some problems on their ability for driving and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employment problems for some employers.
Submitted by 542340749 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: