one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy

Today world is much equipped and sophisticated with the newest medical technologies, where humans are being given a longer life span in turn.

However

, it is a quite moot point

that is

truly involved in bringing benefits or drawbacks to society. The following essay describes both optimistic and pessimistic views which would be possible. To begins with, there are plenty of advantages with the longer life expectancy.

Firstly

, how could we apply a price for the point that our parents and grandparents and get the ability to dwell more time with us? ,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

Definitely

Add a comma

,Definitely

show examples

that is

paramount. Apart from that, as a

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

country

there are many benefits by lowering the death rate. The

country

's health sector get a good reputation in the world. For ,instance there are perfectly lower rates in developed countries

in contrast

to developing nations.

Moreover

, a

country

can get elderly people worthwhile experience and contribution

further

to the

country

's economy. After true ,retirement they can actively take part in welfare works or payable charity works

such

as teaching in schools or colleges. For ,instance

this

is currently on the action in the Netherlands like countries.

Further

, high life expectations would make drive an individual more enthusiastic time before their dreams, hopes, targets in a good perspective which directly affects on

country

's thriving as well.

On the other hand

however

, there are some disadvantages too. When the elder population proportion of a

country

starts to grow, it indeed affects adversely the economy since a considerable amount of money spends on nourishing them.

Further

, even if they are not a part of the labourer force they may require a great percentage of the state's revenue on their health problems.

For instance

, there are some cases that require another person's assistance in looking after them. In

this

case, it will be an additional burden on both the host family and the

country

. So these are the most affecting pessimistic side of

this

fact. In conclusion, according to the above reasons, my opinion is there are an apparently higher amount of advantages than disadvantages.

Submitted by kaushala66 on Mon Sep 20 2021

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

343 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

consequences
improved medical care
life expectancy
advantages
disadvantages
healthcare
quality of life
population
economic burden
elderly
dependency
technology
ethical concerns

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one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues, while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Is it a good thing to spend leisure time with a colleague?

16. There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Some people believe that children should study all subjects at school, while others think they should only study subjects they are good at or find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding changes. Others ,however, think change is always good. Discuss both views and give your opinion.