Today more people are overweight than ever before. What is your opinion are the primary causes of this? What measures can be taken to overcome this epidemic?

contemporary

Add an article

the contemporary

show examples

era , more individuals are obese than

past

Change preposition

in past

show examples

time.

Although

Linking Words

, secondary

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

and eating fast

food

Use synonyms

are

main

Correct article usage

the main

show examples

reasons behind it;

however

Linking Words

, multiple steps can be taken to solve

this

Linking Words

issue. The major reason strike to my mind is that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

people became

workaholic

Fix the agreement mistake

workaholics

show examples

the

Correct your spelling

they

show examples

are forced to eat ready to eat

food

Use synonyms

,which contains

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of spices, oil and extra calories, that are responsible for getting weight, because they do not have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

enough time to prepare

food

Use synonyms

at home which is healthy.

Moreover

Linking Words

, advanced technology

also

Linking Words

making people lazy ,they spend most of their time on

computer

Add an article

the computer

show examples

and in front of

television

Add an article

the television

a television

show examples

and avoid physical activities, as a

result

Add the comma(s)

,result

show examples

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

became obese.

For instance

Linking Words

, one can easily watch all

tourism

Replace the word

tourist

show examples

places from the comfort of their home through YouTube.

Also

Linking Words

,long sitting jobs are

common

Correct article usage

a common

show examples

cause behind it . In order to mitigate the

problem

Add a comma

,problem

show examples

multiple measures can be used.

Firstly

Linking Words

Add an article

the

show examples

government should

bann

Correct your spelling

ban

junk

food

Use synonyms

from school menus and plan healthy diets for children.

Also

Linking Words

, parks should be built in every society so that masses can be motivated for morning and evening

walk

Fix the agreement mistake

walks

show examples

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

authorities should arrange

compagins

Correct your spelling

campaigns

companies

to council the public about physical activities and

also

Linking Words

,they can explain about diseases that

occurs

Change the verb form

occur

show examples

with obesity like diabetes. In conclusion, while, sitting

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

and consumption of junk foods are

main

Correct article usage

the main

show examples

reasons behind

overweight

Add a missing verb

being overweight

show examples

, I believe that

this

Linking Words

issue can be handled with government as well as individual efforts

such

Linking Words

as routine physical

work up

Correct your spelling

workup

show examples

and avoid fast foods.

Sohandeepkaur9327

Sep 21, 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages
Facing the risk is essential to humans, whether it is a personal matter or it is a lifetime career, I believe its benefits outweigh the negatives because it gives the body more courage and confidence and it can be the turning point to a better lifestyle.
6.5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
There are university students who support the idea of adding extra subjects to their primary area of study, while others prefer to focus entirely on the qualifications necessary for their chosen field. Both viewpoints have benefits , each presenting its own advantages and disadvantages. The following essay will examine these two views and share my perspective.
6.5
band
Nowadays new technologies have changed children spend their free time. Advantages and outweigh the disadvantages of this view?
In recent years, new technologies have significantly transformed how children spend their free time. While there are notable advantages to these advancements, there are also some concerns about their impact on children’s development. This essay will explore both sides before determining whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
6.5
band
xIn some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
A large number of the average weight of people who serve decreases their levels of health. This is mainly because of the lack of physical activity and accessibility to junk food. There are a number of solutions which should be implemented to deal with people who have the highest weight.
8
band
Some people think that planning for the future is a waste of time. They believe it is more important to focus on the present. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is sometimes argued that considering the future is not really important. I completely disagree with this view because emphasising the future rather than the moment enhances motivation and reduces errors.

Today more people are overweight than ever before. What is your opinion are the primary causes of this? What measures can be taken to overcome this epidemic?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Nowadays new technologies have changed children spend their free time. Advantages and outweigh the disadvantages of this view?

xIn some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Some people think that planning for the future is a waste of time. They believe it is more important to focus on the present. To what extent do you agree or disagree?