Due to the rapid development and expansion of supermarkets in some countries many small, local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local businesses will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#development #expansion #supermarkets #countries #businesses #people #closure #death #communities

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Yes, I completely agree that

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

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the

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speedy growth and

extention

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extension

Extention

supermarkets

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across some nations

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are

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hampering small local traders as they are unable to compete.

Also

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, some people believe that the closing of small local traders will diminish the local communities. The two main reasons are that the small

businesses

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dont

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don't

have the financial muscle to compete with large traders and

hence

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they are moving out of their ancestral

businesses

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. The

second

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reason behind

this

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is that large

supermarkets

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are hiring more

manpower

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from the small

businesses

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and

hence

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limiting

thier

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their

existance

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existence

To begin

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with, the local

businesses

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do not have

financial

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the financial

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power to compete with large groceries and

hence

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the

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they

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do not continue with their existing

businesses

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. The large retail stores provide a large range of products and the small retailers can not match the same width in the product line.

For instance

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, a big retailer can provide a customer with

internation

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information

and premium brands

where as

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whereas

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the

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small businessman can only provide local made or basic products.

Hence

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can argue that big

businesses

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hold back the local

businesses

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as well as the local

comunities

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communities

Secondly

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, As the

supermarkets

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are huge in size, they require a lot of

manpower

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to manage the same. To overcome

this

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situation, big retailers hire experienced

manpower

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from already running small

businesses

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by providing them with lucrative deals.

Hence

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, people prefer moving from their own small

businesses

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to larger

supermarkets

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and

as a

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result

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,result

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leave their local communal business.

For example

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, a person working in a small shop may earn around ten thousand rupees per month but the large grocery store can provide the same person

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with an

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opportunity to earn fifty

percent

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per cent

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more than what

individual

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an individual

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is actually earning. The difference of five thousand rupees for a person working in

small

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a small

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shop is substantial.

Hence

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, individual ends up leaving the local area and does not remain

the

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part of the local community. In conclusion, the big companies

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overpower

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over power

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overpower

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the local adhesive nature of society and disrupts the natural

functionong

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functioning

of local groups and local trades in the manner of grabbing the

manpower

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as well as providing better products.

Submitted by shailjameel2410 on Thu Sep 23 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

357 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rapid expansion
compete
closure
death
local communities
wider range of products
convenience
unique character
personalized customer service
unemployment
job opportunities
traditional skills
craftsmanship
support
local economy
decline
community spirit

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Due to the rapid development and expansion of supermarkets in some countries many small, local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local businesses will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the government should not put money on building theatres and sports stadiums. They should spend more money on medical care and education. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that the experience children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future life. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your opinions.