IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

While studying abroad provides an opportunity to broaden one's experience, it also presents the danger of negative influence from the host culture. How far do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#opportunity #danger #influence #host #culture
Nowadays , a plethora of individuals goes abroad in search of better
education
. A chunk of individuals opines that
students
 will gain experience and knowledge
that is
 different from their native country whilst other or sceptical about it. I;
however
 believe that international
education
 has more benefits as compared to indigenous
education
.
To begin
 with, international institutes offer better
education
 and employment opportunities. Many
students
 have to pay a very high fee which is very difficult to pay for them or their parents.
This
 brings sincerity in them and warded off any distractions.
Moreover
,Staying in another country make
students
 more tolerant towards the host culture as consequences of it enhance their understanding of different cultures.
For instance
,
students
 will learn how to live in harmony with individuals of different backgrounds and values,
this
 results in positive emotions
such
 as compassion and patience.
Lastly
, nowadays technology made it possible to remain in touch with family or friends by internet or telephone.
Hence
, these factors ensure that they do not forget their goals or they do not go off track.
On the other hand
, according to few people in the country where pupils go may have free or bold culture. They assert that
this
 will have a negative effect on them and sometimes they get involved in illicit activities that will not only lower their academic performance but
also
 they might end up in jail.
For instance
, as they were young they hardly control their emotions and their thrill Seeking behaviour May lead them to trouble. In conclusion, the international student comes in close contact with a foreign culture and they do adopt useful aspects of it.
However
 , most of them do not come under any negative influence.
Submitted by jotjeet9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: