In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?
Nowadays,
children
spend more time
with their friends
than with their families. This
change has occurred because offspring do not want to feel left out amongst their peers and parents
should not force children
to stay home
because they will resent their parents
for it.
Young ones do not want to miss out on social exercise with their friends
. Since the invention of technology, many activities
that people carry out, especially teenagers, are now being posted online. As a result
, children
want to engage more in activities
with their peers so they would also
have fun stories to post on their social media pages and not be the odd ones among their peers. For example
, many young people in South Korea are known to shop and visit fun places with their friends
rather than their parents
, so as to show off the fun activities
they engage in on WeChat, a popular social media platform.
Children
whose parents
mandate spending more time
at home
might hold a grudge towards their parents
. This
is because if children
are forced by their parents
to spend more time
at home
, they may interpret this
as a form of punishment and develop a negative attitude towards their parents
, which defeats the goal of family time
. However
, if they are encouraged to play with their siblings and bond with the family, children
will be more willing to stay at home
. For example
, most children
in Nigeria, even though they spend time
with their friends
, look forward to family time
because parents
in Nigeria emphasize the benefits of spending more time
with family.
In conclusion, children
want to engage in activities
with their friends
and not be left out, and parents
should encourage their children
to stay at home
more, rather than force them so that their children
will not resent them.Submitted by nidaa_hamed on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Be careful with general statements that may need further substantiation or clarification, especially when discussing cultural or geographical examples.
coherence cohesion
Consider diversifying your linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between ideas.
task achievement
To further improve clarity, ensure there's a clear distinction between your examples and general statements.
task achievement
While specific examples are good, ensure they are fully integrated and explained, showing how they support your main argument.
coherence cohesion
Introduces and concludes the topic effectively, providing a clear structure.
task achievement
Provides relevant examples to support main points.
task achievement
Maintains focus on the task’s requirements throughout the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!