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Writing Samples
Band 7

With the rise of e-books comes the decline in paper books. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

#rise #e-books #decline #paper #books #trend
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E-bookse
Correct your spelling
E-books
 are becoming more popular than paper
books
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.
While
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this
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 phenomenon has some drawbacks, I assume its benefits are more. There are some harmful impacts of using
e-
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books
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.
Firstly
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, the digital version of
books
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 could be easily censored and published. Anyone from all parts of the world could download the e-book make changes in its content, and share it on the internet. So, it might be hard to trust the digital versions of
books
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 unless it is downloaded from reliable websites.
Secondly
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, reading
e-
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books
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 from the screen or on the smartphone may harm our health. Staring at the monitor for hours in order to study could decrease the eyesight and lead to severe headaches. In consequence, people are not able to read or study for sufficient time and
this
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 might have a negative effect on public awareness.
However
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, I think it has numerous positive effects
such
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 as being more accessible and eco-friendly. One of the primary advantages of electronic
books
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 is their accessibility. The majority of people have the chance to download and store a great number of
books
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 on their laptop or smartphone. The
books
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 can be read anywhere in the bus station, in a line or even in traffic congestion.
Moreover
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,
e-
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books
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 are beneficial for the environment and use less natural resources. An enormous amount of paper and cardboard are used for publishing paper
books
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 which are just read by a few people. The
e-
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books
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 lessen deforestation and save more trees. In conclusion,
although
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 the digital version of the book has some cons, I personally suppose that its advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by Negar_seddigh on

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coherence cohesion
While the essay has a strong structure and progression of ideas, the clarity can improve by addressing small grammatical issues and ensuring precision in language. For example, in the introduction, 'e-bookse' should be corrected to 'e-books,' and 'this phenomenon has some drawbacks' could be more concise.
task achievement
The coherence can be improved by providing more specific examples that illustrate the points being made. For instance, mentioning a particular instance where misinformation spread through an e-book would strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
task achievement
The main points are clear and relevant, providing a balanced view of the subject.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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