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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

#shops #supermarkets #area #affect #communities #situation
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Many small local
shops
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 have been closed in recent years because customers prefer to do their shopping in large shopping centres or malls. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 is a negative development as losing local
shops
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 in
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Add an article
the neighbourhood
a neighbourhood
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neighbourhood
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neighbourhoods
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 can impact the local
community
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 and
also
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 unnecessary traffic
congestion
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 can happen in city area if everyone starts to do shopping in large shopping centres. Small
shops
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 in our
neighbourhood
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 help the local
community
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 in several ways. Unlike the
Correct your spelling
supermarket
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super market
Correct your spelling
supermarket
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 chains, these local shop owners know each and everyone in the
neighbourhood
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.
Also
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,
people
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 in
local
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the local
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community
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 trust these small businesses as
all
Correct pronoun usage
they all
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 lives in
same
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the same
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neighbourhood
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. So, there is
very
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a very
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 low chance for customers to get cheated by business owners.
In addition
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 to that, there are a lot of families purchasing their daily essential goods from local
shops
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 without paying money immediately and pay them mostly at the end of the month. All of these are possible only in local
shops
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.
On the other hand
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, the trend of
people
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 going to buy their all essential goods from a large shopping centre will increase traffic
congestion
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 in
city
Correct article usage
the city
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 side.
Although
Linking Words
shopping
Correct article usage
a shopping
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 centre appears as a convenient place to buy all essential goods at one place, it may create unnecessary
congestion
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 if
people
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 start to go and buy one or two items which can be easily bought from local
shops
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. In conclusion, local
shops
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 help a lot to
local
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the local
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community
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 and there is a good understanding and trust between
people
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 in
local
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the local
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community
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 and the local business owners so there is
a
Correct article usage
apply
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less chance for cheating.
Also
Linking Words
, if local
shops
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 disappear, these large shopping centres can create unnecessary traffic
congestion
Use synonyms
 in
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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