IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think that radio has become out-of-date, and there is no need to listen to the radio for entertainment and news. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #radio #entertainment #news
Prior to the development of online platforms and televisions,
audio
Add an article
the audio
show examples
 transmission alone was the source of entertainment and
news
. Now that several platforms have become available, it is assumed by some that the
radio
 is of not much need.
On the contrary
, I believe that the possibility of withdrawal of
radio
 usage is far in the future. On the one hand, with the advent of various
news
 and entertainment sources, the popularity of
radio
 has seen a downfall. People opt to read or watch
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
 on their mobile rather than listen to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
radio
.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
 is an efficient way to gather information on interested and relevant articles and hear music, it
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 always convenient to do so.
For instance
, one will not be able to read and grasp more information while multitasking but can do so while listening.
On the other hand
,
however
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
show examples
 number of people who seek to be updated with
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
 while driving or working.
Radio
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
 installed in cars are a handy way to
Correct your spelling
catch up
show examples
catchup
Correct your spelling
catch up
show examples
 with statistics
such
 as
Correct your spelling
weather
show examples
whether
Correct your spelling
weather
show examples
forecast
Fix the agreement mistake
forecasts
show examples
, traffic updates and enjoy music as well.
For example
, the FM station ‘Red FM’ is extremely famous for the live updates of traffic status
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 busy roads at peak hours.
Thus
, increasing the scope of
radio
 use. In conclusion, it is an undeniable fact that the use of
radio
Change the article
the radio
show examples
 is not as popular as it was when it was invented, but it is
also
 true that the use of
this
 broadcasting technology
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 on the verge of extinction.
Submitted by ieltsmaterialof on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • out-of-date
  • relevant
  • portability
  • rural and remote areas
  • internet access
  • sense of community
  • local engagement
  • traditional radio
  • disseminating
  • crucial information
  • demographics
  • primary source
  • familiarity
  • ease of use
  • revitalized
  • internet radio
  • podcasts
  • diverse content
  • engaged in
  • emergency situations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: