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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that it is better to build more public parks and sports facilities in new towns rather than shopping malls. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many
people
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 believe that there should be more public
parks
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 and
sports
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 facilities built in new towns
instead
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 of shopping malls. In my opinion, I totally agree with
this
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 point of view for the undeniable advantages
such
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 as improving
health
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 and enlarging the community.
First
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 of all, it is hard to ignore the benefits that public
parks
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 and places for
sports
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 can bring to
people
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’s
health
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.
Parks
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 are usually built with a lot of benches, trees, and other plants;
therefore
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, the residents can easily get access to the fresh air of nature while relaxing on the benches or under the trees
,
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apply
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 and taking a walk, as well.
This
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 obviously provides
people
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 with the chance of doing light exercise to gain better
health
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 mentally and physically with totally free of charge.
Furthermore
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,
sports
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 facilities are better choices for
people
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 who want to have a good quality of
sports
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 training. Despite some extra fees, those places have functional equipment and professional trainers, which can help
people
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 experience appropriate ways to do exercise.
This
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 is likely to result in prolonging the residents’ life span with healthier lifestyles.
Additionally
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, even though building shopping malls are beneficial in some ways, its advantage cannot outweigh the positive aspects of having more public
parks
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 and
sports
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 supplies. While most
people
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 go to malls for shopping only and it seems like they have few interactions with different
people
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 for other purposes,
people
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 who choose to spend time in
parks
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 and sport places tend to be more open and willing to enlarge their circle of acquaintances. In the
parks
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, local
people
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 usually have a habit of gathering and sharing small talks while relaxing or taking a walk.
This
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 helps them get to know each other easily and have a better understanding of their neighbourhoods.
Similarly
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,
people
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 going to gyms or other sport training centres can make friends easily because of their common hobbies in sport and help each other improve in
health
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 and training. In conclusion, I wholly support the idea of constructing more public
parks
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 and
sports
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 facilities because they obviously bring high opportunities for
people
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 to gain better
health
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.
Moreover
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,
this
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also
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 helps strengthen community bonding by connecting
people
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 together.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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